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« Law & Order: Criminal Intent
November 21, 2006: Blasters
After the season’s best episode so far, last week’s subtly moving “The War at Home,” this one about fallen child TV stars and the Albanian mafia was bound to be a bit of a letdown and — big surprise — it was.
I know I’m not the only one who’s becoming uncomfortable with the Law & Order franchise’s growing dependence on “current events” (read: E!News fodder) for plotlines. This episode’s basis in the lives of ex-Saved by the Bell cast members was so thinly veiled, if Dustin Diamond weren’t so desperate for publicity that he’d peddle his own sex tape, I’m sure Screech would be making a slander case.
Instead, it might be Dancing with the Stars loser Mario Lopez (aka A.C. Slater) calling up his lawyer — and maybe even winning the suit. Can’t you just hear the Criminal Intent writers’ defense: “You see, their character was named Slater, but our character was named Skater.” Come on, Skater isn’t even a name.
Well, it just occurred to me that I spent the last two paragraphs of a Law & Order commentary discussing Saved by the Bell — so either something’s wrong with me or with the people running this show. I mean, a Screech stand-in selling bootleg Harry Potter DVDs out of an ice-cream truck? It’s all just a little silly for this (generally) dignified franchise.
However, all that’s not to say I was bored for a minute. On the contrary, the descent of Skater’s deluded “best friend” into near-madness by the end of this one was like watching a really, really entertaining car crash. Plus, he asked Logan and Wheeler if they were “from TV Guide — for the interview,” so right there he was earning his keep in my book.
The one element that gave this ep some needed depth was those Albanian mafiosos, a none-too-friendly bunch prone to sudden outbursts of brutal violence. In the final moments, they managed to scare the usually unflappable Logan — no easy feat — and I have a feeling we may be seeing this crew again, now that The Noth is “in blood” with them.
Though many of us wouldn’t be satisfied with anything but another D’Onofriosode after last week’s dramatic exit, at least they threw us one bone this week, with Logan taking a playful dig at his partner’s ignorance about Albanian blood feuds: “You’re not up on that, Wheeler? Goren would’ve known.” Nice.
Next Week: Another (suspiciously) Goren-less episode, another ripped-from-the-headlines-ish story, this one loosely based on the whole Lonelygirl15 vlog — yeah, that’s right, I said vlog, and don’t think I’m not a little ashamed — fiasco that happened a few months back. Should be an entertaining one, even if what we really want is to find out what’s happening with the big G. Maybe next month.
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Nov 21, 2006 10:47 PM
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Maybe this is a "nitpick," but the thing that really bugged me in this episode was that the "hot" DVD they kept referring to was 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince' (HBP) which doesn't even start filming until sometime next year. HBP is the 6th book in the series, and right now, only the first four movies are available at all on DVD - and the 5th is in production for a summer release. I get that they wanted a title that would be REALLY hot, and popular enough that even the slowest audience members would understand it's *really* valuable, but there are so many they could have picked from - why choose something that hasn't even been made yet?
Feh. Just one of those annoying things that breaks a scene.
Noth was good to see, though, and I LOVED his comment about Goren - that was cool. Nice to see them acknowledge the other team 
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Nov 22, 2006 6:27 AM
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Meh. If it ain't got Bobby, it ain't no good.
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Nov 22, 2006 9:13 AM
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I thought this episode was pretty good. Seeing that I never watched "Saved by the Bell", I didn't get the RFTH connection at all. Maybe that helped make the episode better for me.
I think that Noth and Nicholson make a great pair. He's clearly been around and she looks the things with fresh eyes. I don't miss the Goren-less episodes, as a matter of fact, I think the series has been more interesting now that they have 2 detective teams. D'Onofrio can get tiresome after a while.
I probably harp on this every week, but Bogosian still is a drag on the show. His monotone delivery makes it seem like he's reading lines and going through the motions. I thought I would have gotten used to him by now but...no.
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Nov 22, 2006 9:17 AM
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I'm glad I wasn't the only one who was miffed at the whole Harry Potter dvd movie that hasn't even started filming yet! I am a HUGE HP fan and was just about screaming at my tv that that movie hasn't even been SET to start production yet!
This is my favorite encarnation of the L&O series, but the writers need to do a bit more research before throwing in
a dvd that doesn't even exist yet.
Okay, enough of my rant. Have a Happy Turkey Day everybody!
PS- Does anybody know who played Mira? I can't place where I've seen her before.
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Nov 22, 2006 11:13 AM
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I thought this episode truly sucked. The writing was abysmal, some of those lines were really eye rollers. Bogosian is a bore, and I will say again that Julianne Nicholson is like a ventriloquist's dummy - she's got nothing. Zzzzzzzzzz. On a 1-10 The Noth gets about a 3. The writers need to pull their heads out, this story line was ridiculous. Not only is next week another "Noth" episode, but so is the week after (and a rerun at that I was told). Please telll me they're not phasing out Goren. If he's gone, so am I.
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Nov 22, 2006 11:59 AM
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I was wondering the same thing, Jewishleah, about the actress playing Mira. I about fell off my chair when I looked it up...she is Masiela Lusha, the actress who played George Lopez's daughter, Carmen, on his sitcom! The blonde hair really threw me off.
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Nov 22, 2006 12:59 PM
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Well, this wasn't my favorite episode but still a solid one that had me interested to the end. I will say some of those scenes, where it was so obvious that neither child actor had grown up and were still living thru there tv personas, was hard to watch. Very sad to see how messed up they both were years later. I was thinking the same thing that others have mentioned - the character of Skater was a little too closely based on Screech from SBTB. I could see that and I've never even seen the show (just commercials and promos). He even looked like him. And I have to admit, I never thought of the Kirk character being based on Mario Lopez. I was thinking more of the blonde guy (can't think of his name). Again, I've never seen the show so maybe Mario was the one who always got the girl!
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Nov 22, 2006 4:43 PM
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I forgot to mention my favorite line of the night. When Wheeler is looking at Kirk in the interragation room and says " I can't believe I had a crush on him ." It still makes me laugh when I think about it. Also, the actor that played Kirk - where have I seen him before? I tried to figure it out for the whole episode and still can't remember.
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Nov 22, 2006 5:51 PM
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What was the song that was playing in the beginning of the episode? I have been trying to find out but i can't seem to find it.
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Nov 23, 2006 1:20 AM
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I think for some of these questions we might have to Ask Matt (Rouse), because I'm trying to remember the guy who played Kirk too. He also looks like the guy in yesterday's Numbers episode, but I haven't watched it yet, it's on tape and next on my list. I still enjoyed the episode. I could never get enough of Criminal Intent, whether it's Goren or Noth. And although I love Goren (and Eames), I find I'm enjoying Noth (and Wheeler) in these episodes. The show was a true replica of what happens to some child stars, and I used to watch Saved by the bell. The other guy from Saved...was Paul Mark Gosselaar who went on to star in NYPD blue after Jimmy Smits left. Ricky Schroder also starred in it at one time, can't remember who was first. Anyway, I enjoyed it, but maybe I'm easy to please and not a nitpicker.
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Nov 25, 2006 12:44 PM
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The guy that played Kirk looked like Jason Brooks who played Peter Blake on "Days of Our Lives" in the 90s.
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Nov 25, 2006 2:24 PM
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You're right raviespecial about the guy on Numbers last night. I thought the same thing. His name is Matt Keesler and he was on an episode of the original L&O years ago (which wasn't on last night and explains why I was watching Numbers).
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Nov 25, 2006 3:45 PM
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Thanks evilkitty. I watched the Numbers tape, (cause I had to go out so I had taped it), and there was the guy? And I saw his name, Matt keesler, or ...lar not sure which and I had planned to post this comment, then I saw yours. And he turned out to be a jerk in the end too!
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Nov 26, 2006 7:28 PM
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I'm surprised no one commented on this yet. The directing at the beginning, in that cool sequence was amazing! Very unlike a typical L&O episode. I loved it.
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Nov 27, 2006 9:57 AM
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