Swingtown

So the big news tonight is that CBS just announced yesterday that Swingtown creator Mike Kelley inked a two-year development deal with the network. First up, he's developing a series for Showtime titled BiCoastal, about a man who has a wife in Los Angeles and who starts a relationship with a man in New York.

So what does all this mean for Swingtown? Hard to say really. A pessimist might think Kelley's new gig means the end of Swingtown; an optimist might say that CBS isn't going to give the guy a deal and then cancel his show. I choose optimism: After all, couldn't Kelley's new relationship with Showtime mean his saucy swingers might be planning a move to cable? With its issues of sexual identity and freedom, it might make a natural partner for BiCoastal, no?

As cliff-hangers go, tonight's season finale upped the ante in terms of sexual jeopardy. For possibly the first time on this show, the partner-swapping that occurred did so accompanied by significant emotional attachments.

More to come...

So there were a lot of surprises tonight, huh? I've got a very demanding guest in town this holiday weekend, so I'll keep it brief, so you guys can get to commenting:

1. Roger got the job – but it's in Cincinnati. Janet also applies for a job, as a snarky advice columnist (heh).

2. Bruce still has the hots for Melinda and lies to Susan to sneak out to see her.

3. Doug isn't taking the job at Laurie's school because he loves her too.

4. Rollergirl is moving to Napierville, since her blowsy mama Gail is a mess. Ricky gives her his CB radio so she and B.J. can keep in touch.

5. Trina is pregnant! But when she tries to tell Tom, he laughs it off like she's kidding.

Discuss.

I thought it was pretty cheeky of the writers of Swingtown to start "Get Down Tonight" with a little post-coital chit-chat between Bruce and Susan about her "faking it." Because even though there was quite a bit of actual coupling in this episode, there were also several plot devices that faked it — served as sex surrogates, if you will — some of which then led to actual sex, and others which merely outlined the hungry, empty space that held the desire for intimacy. Let's spot the fakes together:

Playing cards
I can't believe I'm starting with Ricky. Let's face it: Ricky has been kind of a pill this season. I wish his character had been more sympathetic along the way. That way, his budding teen romance with "Kissing Cousin" Lisa would be as awkward and charming as that of Sam and B.J a few weeks back. But since he continues to be a blustery crankypants, it's hard to root for the kid, isn't it?

Also, he is totally saddled with all kinds of winky, unsubtle, "he doth protest too much"-style dialogue about masculinity that practically throws the poor guy his own Pride parade. Ricky mocks his father for being the one who "wears the apron in the family." He actually says: "I'm not spending a perfectly good summer day at the beach with two lame girls," but amazingly he does not add, "Oooo, yucky, girls are gross." Janet responds to Roger's assertion that Ricky and B.J. have a double date by asking: "With girls?" Sigh.

Anyhow, on said double date, the boys play poker, which, borrowing liberally from the TV cliché handbook, segues into a game of strip poker that ends with two horny boys in tighty-whites thinking: This isn't how I imagined it at all. But, wait a sec, Lisa actually likes Ricky, and actually kisses Ricky, and then they disappear inside the house to make out or whatever. Something happens though — or doesn't happen, as the case may be — and a shirtless Ricky reappears and takes off in a huff. "Girls ruin everything," he tells his father the next morning. Oh, Ricky — not everything! Just most things!

Driving lessons
Sick of taking the El downtown to see Doug, Laurie abandons her green stance (not very 2008 of her) long enough to decide to get her driver's license. Bruce offers to teach her, but Doug already has that covered, old man. Which is actually fine with Bruce because he had to "call in three favors" to get a tee time at some schmancy country club so he can't take her anyway.

[Rant begins here —> OK, let's back up a second. I call foul on the writers for using the expression "call in three favors": What the hell does that mean? Was Bruce unable to get a tee time without the assistance of three other people? Did one guy say, "No, no, no — two favors is not enough for this coveted tee time; you owe me three favors for this one, buddy!" Was it a chain reaction of favor-owing? I just don't get it, even though we hear it said all the time on television. <—Rant ends here]

And it was actually fine with Laurie too, because after she played pretend-driving school with a plunger, some sponges and Doug, she got to have sex with her teacher, which, as we know, is kind of her thing. Since it wasn't much of a lesson — a driving lesson anyway, nudgenudge — she had to resort to dear old Dad's automotive tutelage. But Dad won't let Laurie pull into traffic (read: grow up) because he always thinks she's wrong. But then he asks her if she knows how proud he is of her, and she says no (oops). But she seems happy to hear it, so then everything is right, and Laurie is going to get her license, making hot-for-teacher booty calls that much simpler. Problem solved!

Dancing
Susan and Bruce attempt to recover from last week's disastrous family vacation with some together time. But what to do? A movie? No. Scrabble? "That sounds like a night with the Thompsons," snarks Bruce. Trina helpfully suggests some dirty, dirty disco-dancing at a new club called Jet that Tom's bud Bud has opened. Perfect! What better way to reinvigorate one's marital bonds than to go hang out with the neighborhood swingers at a discotheque? There is some plot device about the Deckers investing in Jet, but it seems mostly inconsequential, except… did anyone notice that once Trina agreed to invest, Tom said: "It's your money anyway"? What's that all about?

Before they board Jet, though, Tom and Trina invite the Millers over for dancing lessons, which is a really cute and funny scene. The actors have clearly been coached because their "New Yorker" technique is flawless. It's at this point that the episode began its takeoff from the safe, grounded 1970s realism of the runway it has taxied on thus far and into the wild blue yonder of the campy 1970s excess of the disco scene. Tom even wore a fairly obvious homage to John Travolta's white vest and bellbottoms from Saturday Night Fever. At the end of this scene, the camera closes in on Susan, whose mischievous grin seems to indicate that she sees some serious stress relief in her future, and not just on the dance floor.

So this is probably the scene that we all imagined what we first heard about Swingtown. Jet is like the Windy City's Studio 54 as seen through a candy-colored kaleidoscope, complete with the scene outside of everyone angling to get in. On the turntable: The Sylvers' delirious "Boogie Fever." On the dance floor: an assemblage of chiefs and chicks of every gender, color, and — as Bruce slyly notes — sexual orientation. It's a groove-gasm and it makes you realize how restrained this show has been in its interpretation of the decade, and that maybe it deserves a little "Boogie Fever" every now and then to keep the blood pumping.

Then Susan takes another Quaalude, which as we all know is this show's shorthand for: I would like some partner-swapping tonight, please! Those dance lessons certainly paid off, as the horny quartet showed off their formidable coordinated line-dancing skills. I have to say: It really looked like the actors had a blast filming these scenes, as their faces periodically broke into very natural, non-actor-y smiles and infectious laughter throughout.

Eventually, our faithful DJ takes things down a notch, though, switching gears to the "slow groove" portion of the program, perfect for making out with someone else's spouse! To the deliberate throb of Exile's "I Want to Kiss You All Over," Bruce did exactly that to Trina, as they did that back-to-front dance that always looks better in movies and on TV than it actually feels in reality. A blissed-out Susan similarly draped herself over Tom, reaching skyward as sparkly confetti fell from the sky like a thousand shattered disco balls. "Should we all head back for a dip?" purrs Trina.

Dissolve to… the sparkly water in the Deckers' pool, where I got a chuckle out of the fact that this too-hot-for-CBS sex scene began with an underwater shot of artfully framed, interlaced legs, which reminded me of the couples' first Fourth of July assignation on the sofa, where network TV made it necessary for interlaced fingers and backrubs to stand in for actual sex. The editing in this scene was pretty hilarious too, with more quick cuts than an episode of Club MTV (Holla at your boy, Eric Nies!), lest they reveal any naughty bits.

As the Millers say their awkward, polite goodbyes after what is presumed to be a vigorous bout of hot, offscreen monkey love, Trina has another opportunity to molest Susan's jewelry, as she has almost forgotten her earrings again. And then the door closes and the Millers stand silent for a second on the front step…

Bruce: (Hopeful) "That was fun, right?"
Susan: (Absently) "Yeah."
Bruce: (Resigned) "Let's go home."

It's clear that, with their instantaneous regret, the Millers appear to agree with me that another romp with the Deckers was definitely not the solution to what ails their marriage.

Um… Typing?
The industrious Janet gets a temp job in the steno pool of the local newspaper. (She also got a shiny new hair-helmet to wear to the office, which was nice.) This is where my sex surrogate theme doesn't exactly apply. Sexual-harassment surrogate maybe though! You see, her new boss is kind of ass-grabby. "With all due respect," she tells him, "if you touch my rear one more time, my husband will come down here and kick yours." Go, Janet!

Let's talk about Henry (David Monahan, who you probably barely recognize from Crossing Jordan), Janet's no-nonsense coworker, for a second. Is it just me, or did his hair, that 'stache and those trim-cut suits give him an unfortunate resemblance to Tracey Ullman playing a flight attendant named Lance?

It's clear that Janet's insane organizational skills make her a natural for the business world, and she quickly proves herself to be worthy of a permanent job offer. So maybe work actually is Janet's sex surrogate, because one look at her face and you can see that an empty in-box comes pretty close to ecstasy for our favorite little domestic dominatrix.

Emboldened by her first day on the job, Janet decides to have a come-to-Jesus talk with Roger about his still-pretty-aimless job search. It's clear that she is totally freaking out (in the most calm and supportive of ways, of course) that her husband is still unemployed, and thinks it's time he get back to work. "Once that happens, everything will fall into place, and we can go back to exactly the way things used to be," she says. Uh-oh! Haven't you been listening, Janet? Roger doesn't want the status quo; he wants more.

Making Chicken Kiev
While Janet is off at the salt mines playing 9 to 5, Roger is at home playing Mr. Mom. First thing on Janet's OCD-assisted to-do list: Make Chicken Kiev for dinner. This dish was a perfect choice for many reasons. First, everyone ate Chicken Kiev in the '70s, but practically nobody does anymore — much like Waldorf Salad, Veal Oscar, sherbert, and Quaaludes (see above). Second, at first glance, it's just an ordinary breaded chicken dish, but — oh! — when pierced with a knife, a molten butter-and-parsley center squirts out. Kind of sexy for chicken, right? (A similar construction was employed to a less-sexy effect with Freshen Up gum in the '80s.) All in all, it was a perfect sex surrogate for this fake couple who likes to skip rocks together, if you know what I mean…

Roger goes to the only grocery store in all of Chicago's North Shore and naturally runs into Susan because it's impossible for anyone to buy fresh produce alone on this show. He's all moony-eyed and "my place or yours?" with her, and they end up back at the Thompsons' house massaging salt and pepper into chicken breasts while the bow-chicka-bow-bow music plays in my head. "It helps if you rub it in," Susan says. Contrast Roger's bursting sexy-chicken with the dry, tasteless fish sticks Susan serves Bruce that same night (with a most unsexy glop of ketchup on the plate) and I think we all know what's going on here.

"The only way to tackle a problem is to give it a name," says shrink Carolyn Gardiner, who Roger sees again this week. "Susan," Roger says, going on to say, about his marriage to Janet, "I think there should be more." (There's that word again!) A few scenes later, we get a better idea of what he wants more of when he bum-rushes Susan in her kitchen and, you know, makes Chicken Kiev with her, by which I mean he kisses her! As the significance of this moment sinks in, the soundtrack narrates their inner monologues with "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?", a song made famous by the Shirelles in 1960. This 1971 version, however, is a cover by Carole King from her seminal album Tapestry. (Aside: When we were kids, my sister and I thought the singer's name was "Carole Kingtapestry.") Freed of its girl-group bounce, King's version reveals the longing and desperation that she intended the song to have when she wrote it when she was just 18. If you listen closely, you can hear Joni Mitchell and James Taylor on backup vocals, making sweet, sweet love to plaintive harmonies. The song is cut off as the episode ends with an abrupt fade to black, leaving a stained-glass question mark hanging in the air: What will happen in the song's figurative tomorrow?

Next week (in two weeks actually): We're at the end of the road, folks! I have a confession to make. I have actually already seen Swingtown's season (series?) finale, which is very appropriately titled "Surprise!" because it is jam-packed with them. You won't get any spoilers from me though, for I found it very interesting to see which tidbits CBS chose to tease: Roger tells Susan he's in love with her! Trina is pregnant?! Bruce lies about having to go back to the office to get his briefcase! (Suffice it to say that they are not giving away all this episode's juicy surprises!)

UPDATE: More surprises! CBS called me to say that "Surprise!" is in fact not the season/series finale, but the penultimate ep. So I guess we're all in the dark until Sept. 5 when it airs.

What did you think? Is disco dancing a gateway drug? Where do Susan and Roger go after The Kiss? Will Janet get her ass grabbed again (ha, I kind of hope so)? And are you craving Chicken Kiev as much as I am? Or do you have another sex surrogate you'd like to share with the group?

Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

OK, I realize you're probably all watching the Opening Ceremonies of the Olympics right now, as you should, but I hope you'll stop by some time this weekend and share your thoughts on this week's episode of Swingtown. "Running on Empty" wasn’t the most eventful of episodes, but it was rich with subtext. At first blush, this week's stories seemed to be about one thing, but ended up being actually about something entirely different. Read on!

Going to the cabin
It seems to be about… getting the Miller family (coughcough, Laurie) back on the rails.
After last week's comedy of errors, Bruce forces his family to go to the cabin — an idea that appeals to nobody, especially Laurie, who wants to go to the Jackson Browne concert with Doug. Susan advises caution, concerned that Bruce's inflexibility may alienate their rebellious daughter. "I do not need to be careful; I am her father," he blusters, pretty much telegraphing the resolution of the episode.

But it's actually about… accepting the changes that have taken place within the Miller family.
The Miller women use the telephone to represent their respective desires to be elsewhere. Laurie calls Doug and Susan calls… Roger! Susan longingly tells Roger that this trip isn't as fun as the last one, when they skipped stones together. "I used the wrist thing, it worked like a charm," she reports forlornly. While I like the intrigue of their secret, special friendship, I can't help but think that these stolen conversations are ultimately ill-advised.

Laurie, on the other hand, vents her frustration in the form of a benign, though rather direct interrogation of Susan about her love for Bruce, and how swinging factors into that. Now, first of all, this conversation had an only-on-television quality that would most likely never occur in reality. Sure, Laurie's questioning was valid, but would she ever have the nerve to pursue it? It made me a little squeamish, to be honest, and the dappled, filtered sunlight and lakeside setting reminded me of nothing more than a circa-1976 Massengill commercial. "Mom, can I ask you a really personal question? Do you ever have that 'sex-with-multiple-partners' feeling?"

As "fresh" as Laurie's questions were, though, Susan chooses to keep things abstract, reaffirming her love for Bruce and focusing on the evolutionary nature of relationships. At first, I was surprised that Laurie, the very model of the Me Generation woman-in-training, wasn't more open-minded about her parents' sexual exploration. But I suppose when you're in the throes of one hell of a teenage crush, it's hard to imagine your love as anything but real, permanent, and ideal. Plus, it's her mom and dad, and that's just: ew. Despite my reservations about the subject matter, I really liked the interplay between Shanna Collins and Molly Parker in this scene. That, at least, rang true to me.

Disillusioned by her mother's sad dose of realism, Mini-Ali McGraw decides to hit the road, Jack, accepting a ride from a spunky old broad named Norma (guest star Pat Crawford Brown, who you might recognize from Desperate Housewives, where she played the drunken-though-tragically-misunderstood Ida). It seems that Norma has been married four times, and is basically here to tell Laurie that real love is difficult to find. "Men are like lightbulbs: You keep screwing until one of them works," she says with a naughty smirk. "And they don't last forever."

Once Susan and Bruce catch up with Laurie in a Honey Creek diner, there was a nice scene in which four adults sat down to have some pie, and that line between the parents and children was once again blurred, as a bewildered Susan and Bruce had to accept that their daughter was in a stable, mature relationship with a pretty nice guy, so they let her go see Jackson Browne after all. Semi-happy ending! (Except that, since it's only 1976, there is no way that Browne would be singing "Running on Empty" at that concert since that album wasn't released until December 1977.)

Seeing the shrink
It seems to be about… Roger, depressed and aimless as he has been since he lost his job
Didn't you think it was kind of hilarious how Janet kept telling Roger how depressed he was? On the recommendation of Brad Davis (he who likes to watch from last week), Roger sees a shrink — "who am I? Woody Allen?" he cracks — with Janet at his side "for moral support." For some reason, adding a shrink to a show (see: The Sopranos, Monk) usually gives a show a real dramatic kick in the pants, as it did here when it became clear that it wasn't Roger who really needed the head-shrinking.

But it's actually about… Janet, who realizes that she might have some "issues" as well
It's clear that Janet needs for there to be something wrong with Roger. Because, if that isn't true, then maybe there's something wrong with Janet, and she is so tightly wound, I'm not sure she could deal with that. But deal it with it she does, in her own way. After storming out of the already-passive-aggressive session when Dr. Headshrinker turned her analytic flashlight on Janet, she returns to her office, purportedly to make sure she knows that they won't be paying for the aborted session. (Which, obviously, could have been done over the phone.) In the process, Janet ends up revealing two juicy tidbits: 1) she would maybe like to — gasp! — get a job and 2) Tom's flirtation isn't exactly not welcomed, and isn't exactly not reciprocated. I loved seeing Miriam Shor go through this complicated series of revelations, as I always do when Janet loosens up a little and sees the world through its not-black-and-white complications. It's indicative that Janet is as much a main character of this show as Susan is, and her slower transition to open-mindedness is almost more enjoyable to watch.

The Thompsons and Deckers have dinner.
It seems to be about… a misunderstanding, when Janet is caught almost confronting Tom about his feelings.
After her head shrinkage, Janet decides to set Tom straight. She is not interested in pursuing any sort of relationship with him. But… Trina comes home and spoils the mood, so she hastily invites the couple over for dinner while the Millers are off getting the family back on track (but not really at all actually). During dinner, Janet unsubtlely informs Tom of her decision, and his reaction is really hard to read. Is he amused that Janet read into his harmless flirtation too much? Is he surprised that Janet is taking such a hard line with a man clearly used to smoother operations? Or is he hurt and/or disappointed that his overtures were so systematically rebuffed? It's hard to say really, as Grant Show's face seems to convey all those things at different times during the scene. Much like the Millers' promise that swinging was a one-time thing, though, the force of Janet's words didn't convince me totally that the book is closed on this particular pairing.

But it's actually about… a study in contrasts. The Deckers are nothing like the Thompsons, and never want to be.
Especailly since… it's important to note that immediately following their dinner with the Thompsons — "How can an evening be freaky and boring at the same time?" cracks Tom — the Deckers immediately reopened their marriage. Personally, I think it was the gigantic cheese ball that did it. "We're going to try to get to bed early," Trina purrs. As much as I liked the tete-a-tete vignettes at chez Decker this episode (French maid, a little bondage, etc.), I was happy to see Trina and Tom get back on the horse, so to speak, and back into bed… with Anthony and Michelle. With my favorite predators back on the prowl, what chance do the Millers and Thompsons stand with so many sexy outfits and themed parties yet to unveil?

What did you guys think? What was "Running on Empty" really about? I know I didn't mention them this week, but did B.J. and Ricky's reunion seem as rushed and tacked-on to you as it did to me? We've only a few more eps of Swingtown to enjoy; what would you like to see happen next? How should this bold summer experiment spend its twilight weeks, and what would be a satisfying resolution to you? Let your thoughts be heard!

Next week! Disco dancing! The appearance of more actually pool-based swinging! And Susan and Roger not-so-accidentally run into each other!

Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

Voyeurism assumed a potent position in this week's episode of Swingtown. Hottie shrink Brad Davis is researching a book about swinging, an activity in which he, symbolically, does not participate, but "just likes to watch." Like a sexy, sexy Machiavelli, Trina surveys from behind her camera lens, and dispenses casual, questionable advice about the marriages of her friends. Rollergirl has some shrewd revelations about Ricky and his friendship with B.J. And most hilariously, Laurie and Doug are the unwitting, horrified witnesses to a botched assignation between her parents and the Davises. Overall, there was a lot of observation going on, and it yielded some satisfying dramatic — and comedic — tension. When it comes to Swingtown, I like to watch too. Here are my observations:

"I used to like dissecting stuff in school, peeling back the layers to see what's underneath." —Trina, on her "honesty compulsion"

It was cute to see Trina attempt to "do something a little more Janet," namely bake muffins, in an attempt to bridge the gap after last week's Puzzlerama fiasco. The push-pull of this friendship wears on me, but it was interesting that Trina, having closed her marriage "for now," indulges vicarious thrills by encouraging both the Thompsons and the Millers to visit the Pendulum Club (What does a pendulum do? Swing!) with the aforementioned Brad Davis and his wife, Sylvia the Sexy Bunny Lady Lawyer. Bruce called her "Lawyer Lady" tonight, obviously demonstrating that Jack Davenport needs to be reading my episode recaps to brush up on the correct Swingtown terminology.

The Pendulum Club appears to be some silly amalgamation of that Egyptian Michael Jackson video with Iman and The Love Boat's Pirates Cove lounge (an Isaac-style, two-finger-gun salute to you, my groovy readers!), with various chiffon scarves being sashayed to and fro from lantern-lit corners. "Isn't this place a scream?" Sylvia asks. "I could scream," snarks Janet. But its charms are not lost on Susan, still smarting from the news that Bruce kissed Melinda (twice!). Clearly wanting to put that image out of her head, she takes the opportunity to initiate an impromptu date with the Davises at what they think is their empty house.

"At this stage, I'm really just brainstorming." —Roger, on his search for a new… what exactly?

There was something sad and oafish about Roger's hunt-and-peck, typewriter-based quest for a new career. "Who am I?" his words seemed to ask. "You're not exactly a born risk-taker, Rog," Bruce told him over drinks to discuss an exciting career on the options exchange. While Bruce's harsh evaluation might serve to demoralize Roger further, I'm guessing it will, in fact, be a rallying cry, as Susan's best friend faces the specter of risk in the coming weeks.

"I'm in hell." —Laurie, trapped behind the bar while her parents and the Davises get to know each other better

I have a confession to make: I kind of got into Laurie and Doug's brainy courtship storyline this week. "You realize you have more John Denver albums than my mother," Laurie teased. Indeed, half-dressed in Doug's bed, there is sunshine on both their shoulders, despite last week's awkward meeting with Susan during their supermarket Carter campaigning. Again it's politics, in the form of the Republican National Convention, which ignites their passions. Plus, Laurie knows that Giscard d'Estaing (thanks, Wikipedia!) is the president of France. "That is so hot," Doug pants. Ah, l'amour!

But like Charlemagne advancing on, um, somewhere (OK, France metaphor over!), their Gerald Ford-inspired makeout session is rudely interrupted by the early return of the Millers and Davises, sending the pair to hide out. "Oh my God, they're not alone," Laurie whispers from behind the French doors, in what I thought was a funny nod to '70s horror films. The swinging is coming from inside the house!!!

"I guess a modern marriage is one that is equal and open to change," Susan telegraphs in her interview with Brad. While Susan sees the Q&A as a flirtatious prelude to some acción, she is disappointed (?) to discover that Brad would rather make an omelet than, er, break some eggs. Sylvia, on the other hand, likes a little mess, as demonstrated by her suggestive story about the Haight and "Crimson and Clover," her proffering of a joint, and the speedy removal of her gold jumpsuit.

But like the best episodes of Three's Company, this scene crescendoed in the reveal. Doug and Laurie are caught attempting to escape as Bruce and a half-dressed Sylvia are on the verge of some serious debriefing. As some of you clever commenters have noted, the distinction between parent and child — and the relative responsibility of their behaviors — is often blurred. Which is why as accusations flew in both directions (Bruce: "How old are you?" Laurie: "Who is this woman?"), Bruce's claims that he is going to "take back control of this family" didn't quite have the moral heft that he might have intended.

"Sorry, I'm not spending two minutes in the closet with a dude." —Ricky

B.J. and Rollergirl head over to Ricky's basement, where he's playing king of the nimrods, mixing some sure-to-be-toxic concoctions and overseeing a Pong tournament. Naturally, they end up playing a Spin the Bottle-Two Minutes in the Closet hybrid, as all pre-teen parties seem to do. When Ricky again attempts to sabotage Rollergirl's friendship with B.J. by pointing out that he has known him longer, she shoots back: "Yeah, well, it's pretty obvious how you feel about him." How are we to interpret that statement? Well, I know you guys think that the show might be hinting at a future exploration of Ricky's sexuality, and after tonight's episode, I can't say that I disagree with you. Since everything about Ricky's party was toxic, it was nice to see that the cute, blond moppets subsequently found an antidote in a sweet kiss outside the Miller house, as the comedy of errors inside exploded on to the sidewalk in the form of Brad, Sylvia, and Doug, re-dressing as they stumbled to their respective cars.

"This ought to be one for the scrapbook" —Janet, upon entering the Pendulum Club

Little did she know! As I did last week, I'll end with Tom, who again sat atop Mt. Sexual Revolution Genius. When he observes Janet's discomfort with the whole afterparty scene at the Deckers, he sweeps in for a little poolside chit-chat with her. He emphasizes that whatever Roger may or may not want to do with "the unicorn" (Get it? Because she's horny?), he's going to bring it all back home to Janet. "You are a beautiful woman, don't you ever forget that," Tom tells Janet with the smoothness of a Cutty Sark on the rocks. And then he kisses her! Well, we knew this was coming, but did we know it would come wrapped in such a sympathetic, caring package? The lesson here: Swinging is about caring, people!


Next week: Back to the cabin? Susan calls Roger and tells her "this trip is not as fun as the last one was," which prompts Bruce to rip the telephone cord from the wall.


Now I know all you cheeky monkeys like to watch, what did you observe about this week's episode of Swingtown?

Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

I have to say that I'm bummed that CBS has moved Swingtown to Friday night, if only because such a switch is usually an indication that a show is on its way to cancellation. At the fall TV press tour, CBS president Nina Tassler expressed her support for and love of the show, though she also wished the ratings were higher. I'm guessing it'll complete its summer run, but after that, who knows? Stay tuned.

Have you all seen the movie Secrets & Lies? If you haven't, you should put it in your Netflix queue tout suite. It's about an adopted black British woman (Without a Trace's Marianne Jean-Baptiste) who goes looking for her birth mother, only to discover that she's white! There's a scene near the end of the movie where everyone's secrets are painfully, disastrously revealed, and the great Timothy Spall gives this impassioned speech about the dangers of keeping secrets. "Secrets and lies!" he bellows, as if to say, "Pay attention, that's the title and theme of the movie you're watching!" It's Shakespearean in tone, and a really moving moment.

The beginning of this week's episode of Swingtown has a similar, though less speechy scene, in which those benevolent schemers Tom and Trina Decker have a little chat about their Puzzlerama party. Puzzlerama -- "truth-or-dare on a roller coaster," according to Tom-- is a game that ferrets out the secrets of the neighborhood with clever clues and a scavenger hunt involving rifling through the neighbors' houses. "I'm an open book – it's secrets that are wicked," purrs Trina. (She kind of purrs everything, right?)

While I have to admit this game sounds like my worst nightmare (stay out of my underwear drawer, please!), part of me wishes my friends were as organized when it came to parties. Mostly we just go to bars. I did, however, once go to a 30th birthday party with an all-over-Manhattan scavenger hunt, but once I opened that storage locker in the basement of Grand Central Station and was greeted with the stale stench of urine instead of the next clue, the fun was pretty much over. Similarly, the stale stench of secrets seemed to kill this game of Puzzlerama, whose ultimate effect was to ruin everyone's lives in a way that no stained-glass question mark could ever remedy. Who had the dirtiest little secrets? Read on!

Susan has a new secret best friend. While I liked the idea of Susan having a racy dream about Roger and a group suntan-lotion application session, it seemed a bit repetitive of Janet's hot-apple-pie dream from a few episodes ago, didn't it? Aesthetically though, its sun-drenched, candy-colored palette made me realize how clever the cinematography and art direction of Swingtown is. It's typically as dull as a paneled basement with the flat, muted tones (mustard, rust, blue-gray and brown) of the time period. Nevertheless, Susan's complicated feelings about Roger remain interesting to me, and I hope, as Bruce becomes more and more inattentive, they will yield some real dramatic tension.

Roger went to a secret pool party. I was heartened by last week's détente in the Thompson household, as Janet agreed to help Roger achieve more. Which is why it was kind of devastating to see that cozy teamwork shattered by Roger's further pool-party deceptions. Thus far, Josh Hopkins has played Roger as a winning though dim-witted little buddy, but I'm hoping that Roger's recent change in employment status will encourage him to broaden his horizons, sexual and otherwise. Hopkins (Cold Case, Brothers & Sisters) certainly has the acting chops for it.

Trina thinks Susan and Roger have a secret. In a nice echo of prior Decker-sponsored extracurricular activities (cough), Trina forms the Puzzlerama teams by swapping spouses. The perceptive Trina positively drips metaphor when she says -- scratch that, purrs -- that she paired Susan and Roger because she saw "a great team that could win it all if they wanted to." But we all know that "winning it all" means something different to Trina, as indicated by her voyeuristic pool-party photos of Roger's hard bod. After spending some QT caressing Susan's gold-hoop earring, she also found Roger's borrowed swim trunks in Susan's unmentionables drawer, which got her imagination working overtime, much to Susan's embarrassment and annoyance. "Winning isn't everything," she tells Trina.

Janet figured out everybody's secrets. "I knew you were crafty, but not... crafty," Janet says to Trina. Heh. Miriam Shor had some fun again this week showing us Janet's giddy competitive streak and her great chemistry with Grant Show (foreshadowing?). I like the continued integration of the couples: Janet actually seemed happy to go to the Deckers' party. The ambiguous confrontation between Janet and Roger at the end of the episode -- "What are you talking about?" Janet asks for all of us -- seems to indicate that there will be added complexity in the Thompsons' marriage, a development that I think will serve both actors well.

Laurie's mom deduces her secret affair with Mr. Stephens, er, Doug. Last week, in my absence, Adam put this better than I have thus far this season. This student-teacher-relationship stuff is just straight-up clichéd. It's a nice reversal that it's the "grown-up" who wants to take things slowly, and I generally like the outspoken Laurie, but something about this storyline leaves me cold. Adding the Carter campaign to the mix doesn't help. Even the shocking revelation by Susan that her daughter might be doing more than reading Doug's master's thesis -- titled "Passion vs. Intellect" with unsubtle symbolism -- played kind of flat, although Molly Parker's always-expressive face tells us that there will be more on this subject later, so I'll reserve judgment for now.

Rollergirl and B.J. have a secret storyline – where is it already? No real secrets here, but wasn't it nice to see a smile on Rollergirl's face? She was decidedly cheerier tonight, now that B.J.'s back from Native American crafts camp.

Mareno and Gail need to have more secrets. Isn't it strange that the two most promiscuous characters on this show about sexual freedom are also the least sympathetic and/or interesting? Despite my tiresome calls for carnality at every turn of the dramatic page, something about these two crosses the line from saucy to skanky. Maybe they're supposed to demonstrate contrast, but I wish they were a little more fleshed-out.

Mareno is a tolerable himbo, and his screen time is so limited that, you know, who cares? But the writers have hinted that Gail has an interesting backstory (MIA/dead Vietnam vet husband, the mysterious Stu, all that aluminum foil), but she's never given the chance to do more than pant and grope and roll her eyes. Barring any deeper knowledge, I'd at least want Gail to be funnier, campier, sexier -- don't you?

Bruce and Melinda begin and end (?) a secret affair. After whatever happened last week (do we know for sure that they didn't sleep together?), it was obviously one of those only-on-TV not-coincidences that Melinda showed up at the Puzzlerama party with Mareno. I admire Melinda's nerve, especially considering how taken Susan was with her at the benefit. At the train station newsstand, the intoxicating smells of newsprint and train exhaust combined to ignite the fires of passion between the coworkers and they end up sucking face. Once Bruce realizes that Tom knows his secret (see below), he breaks it (what is it exactly?) off with Melinda… for now. I can't imagine that that's the end of Melinda.

Tom understands the danger of secrets. Oddly, Tom is the voice of reason this week. When he spies Bruce and Melinda kissing among the porn, his quick, rational thinking prevents Janet from seeing the illicit liplock. Later, he advises Bruce coolly not to "dip his pen in the company ink." And during his and Trina's Puzzlerama postmortem, it's Tom that intones with the wisdom of the sages: "Open and honest doesn't always mean easy." Ain't that the truth!

Next week! Tom and Trina endorse monogamy! Bruce and Susan go to a sex club! Up is down! Down is up!

What did you think? Are secrets as wicked as Trina thinks they are? Or are there instances in which some things are better left unsaid? Also: Sex club? Is this a good idea?

Discover all of Swingtown's secrets by watching full episodes in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

Hey, guys! As I'm sure you've guessed by all the stories he's been filing, Mickey is out in L.A. covering the TCA press tour. So I, Adam Bryant, am recapping tonight's episode. Since Trina is all about being "open and honest", I'll admit that I haven't been as dedicated to the show as Mickey since viewing the pilot, but I will still share my thoughts on tonight's episode as a way to get you guys chatting. So, let's do it!

Since the kiddies were out of the way for tonight's episode, I'm going to approach the recap based on each couple, spousal or otherwise.

Tom and Trina: Ah, the dark side of open relationships. The thrust of tonight's episode was built around the building jealousy and distrust caused by Tom when he willingly slept with Bobbi ( a member of his crew) in Tokyo without clearing it with Trina first. (To make matters worse, Tom invited his entire crew over for a pool party to "beat the heat" before Trina even knew he was back in town.) Of course, Tom blamed his slip-up with Bobbi on the jealousy created by Trina's recent shack-up with her high school ex (plus "Bobbi's on the list and hard to resist"), but Trina couldn’t be bothered with excuses, as she was already on the prowl for someone to assist in her revenge. When Susan and Roger (more on that later) show up at the party, things cool down, and Trina spends the rest of the night, to Tom's surprise, in the dark room rather than fulfilling her vengeful lust. As a result, the Deckers decide to do away with the "ocean that separates" them, and get back to basics by staying exclusive for a while. How sweet!

Roger and Janet: Afraid to tell Janet that he lost his job (something he has already confided in Susan) Roger keeps on playing make-believe, taking the train to "work" each day, and even lying about a promotion. But of course, is secret is blown when Janet bounces a check. Oh, right, jobs provide money. Good one, Rog. When Janet finally confronts him after his day with Susan (again, more later) he confesses his complete dissatisfaction with his life, saying he wants more. And kudos to Janet for stepping up and saying she will give it to him. Their candlelight dinner was a sweet final touch, but I can't help feel more trouble brewing.

Laurie and Doug: As Mickey would say: Meh. I don't care much for Laurie's character, and I definitely don't see anything special about the cliché student-teacher storyline. Their relationship inched forward tonight as Laurie learned that he was hesitant about taking a full-time teaching job, but only through his friends. He was clammy as usual when she confronted him about it (and taking a trip to his place), but hey, they ended up holding hands. Again, meh.

Susan and Roger: While Susan spends her day wallpapering the house with no A.C., Roger decides to pay her a visit. (Not like he has work to do, after all). He helps fix the broken air conditioner just in time for the power to go out. Bummer. So the duo hops over to the pool party, when things get interesting in the deep end. Roger's comments about "love being when someone sees you the way you see yourself" and the infamous "4th of July party" bring Susan how she "sees" Roger and to confess that she and Bruce hadn't "connected" in a long time prior to that night and were caught up in the moment. Her willingness to open up represented a growing comfort level with Roger that appears to be turning into something else. (And Trina's raised eyebrow knows it!) After several long stares, and a potential sunburn for Susan (damn you, UV rays!) Roger decides he has to head home to confess his secrets. But rest assured, he didn't confess them all.

Bruce and Melanie: Bruce's advice to new lady trader was the theme for the whole show: the importance of making the right connections. While celebrating their good day on the trading floor, the power goes out, allowing Bruce and Melanie to drink more than they should while taking the other patrons' money in a poker game. Once the crowd thins, Melanie bluntly turns Bruce's lesson around on him, telling him to put "antenna" up (wink, wink) and see the connection right in front of him (or in the apartment around the corner). Unfortunately, Bruce's decision is left ambiguous, as he is awkward with Susan when he arrives home, and "needs to shower." He also looks pained as he lies in bed awake (and alone) as Susan soaks up her cool air (representing Roger?) as she strokes her sunburned shoulders.

So, do you think you Bruce did the deed? What do you make of the growing closeness of Roger and Susan? Will Janet's willingness to stick by her husband's side be rewarded or only bring on more heartache? How long will the Deckers' exclusivity last? Share your thoughts and check back next week for more!

"Come on, Mom," Laurie says, as Susan frets over wallpaper samples. "Get in touch with your authentic self." Laurie's vocabulary is like an annoying Me Generation glossary, but it nicely underscores the theme of this week's episode of Swingtown, as our beloved swingers express varying degrees of authenticity in very different ways.

Trina and Tom: The Deckers both seem miserable about Tom's transfer to the Tokyo route. But, for now, Trina is dealing, even accompanying him to the airport before a long haul. While they hang in the lounge playing their "airport game" (essentially a game of "who'd you do?"), they bump into Trina's high-school sweetheart Luke (Ryan McPartlin), who was cast with scary period accuracy. Dude looks like he just walked off the set of an Old Spice commercial, right?

As Trina and Luke walk down Memory Lane, something strange happens: The swaggering Tom gets jealous. Despite his reservations, they ultimately end up in the sack with Old Spice anyway, but it's clear that Tom's feelings about swinging have been altered tonight. As I've said before, it's nice to see that Trina and Tom are actually in love, but it's also refreshing to see that having an open marriage isn't all hairy chests and short-short robes all the time. Judging from next week's previews, Tom's complicated feelings will be explored further, and I think the series will be the better for it.

Susan and Bruce: In a patronizingly sexist way, Bruce urges Susan to join the Children's Hospital Ladies Auxiliary to get in good with Bruce's boss' wife, Rita Pierce. Rita is pretty much a one-dimensional caricature of a woman of privilege. She heads up the planning committee for the children's-hospital benefit, but, as Susan says, she probably couldn't find the building on a map. Since Susan can't seem to do anything alone, she brings Janet with her to an Auxiliary luncheon. Janet is immediately dazzled by the ladies-who-lunch, which is a sharp contrast to Susan's hesitation about joining the group.

At the benefit, Susan meets Melinda, Bruce's coworker. Melinda lives in a man's world, but appears to understand the game perfectly. It's clear that Susan admires Melinda's authentic life, different as it is from those of the Auxiliary barracudas with whom Susan struggles to fit in. Ultimately, Susan agrees to play nice with Rita and her cohorts, for Bruce's sake. Susan's journey to authenticity is a gradual one, and tonight's battle was one that she felt she could concede.

Janet and Roger: "Nobody touch the jacket!" Janet shrieks, when boozy Rita spills her Bloody Mary on herself at the luncheon. Janet performs some sort of stain-removal triage involving large quantities of Sweet-n-Low, and nabs a coveted invite to the Auxiliary's benefit as well. Janet is a bit of a social climber, it seems, and, during the benefit's auction, she gleefully bids on and wins dinner for two at the Lakecrest Country Club for $100 (to which this circa-2008 New Yorker said: "Such a deal!"). Rita invites both Susan and Janet to join the Auxiliary, and Janet is so beside herself with happiness that she runs home and immediately crafts a page in her scrapbook to commemorate the evening. Her hair was kind of funny tonight, right?

If only a new flip hairdo and pressed flowers were all it took to ensure happiness. Once Janet gets a taste of the good life at the luncheon, she nags Roger to ask for a raise. Instead, after 12 years as Mutual of Omaha's best salesman, he's fired. Naturally, he doesn't tell Janet, who is currently suffering from delusions of grandeur about joining a country club and making scrapbooks with all her new rich friends. Roger confesses to his secret confidante Susan that he's happy about having lost his job, since selling insurance required him to be -– wait for it -- inauthentic.

The Kids: B.J. and Ricky are shipped off to camp, so no pining for Rollergirl this week. Laurie, on the other hand, has to prepare for her final oral exam, in which she has to apply the lessons of the great philosophers on the subjects of authenticity and self-expression to her own life. She balks at the assignment, since it would require her to reveal her secret affair with Mr. Stephens, who inexplicably scolds her for not being forthright in her exam. But now, to quote the immortal Alice Cooper, school's out for the summer, which means Laurie can suck face with her hottie no-longer-her-philosophy-teacher Doug with abandon, a course of action apparently somehow sanctioned by Kierkegaard.

Next week: Tom cheats! Susan and Roger touch each other! Bruce has a wife, but Melinda has an apartment! And Roger tells Janet that he needs more! Finally! Somebody get the Thompsons into bed – stat! Talk about complications…

What did you think of "Friends with Benefits"? Was tonight's quest for authenticity a nice metaphor for the progress of this television series, which continues to move toward its own truth? How will Tom and Susan confront their respective crises of conscience? And will they do it together?

Put your keys in the bowl, loosen your tie, recline on the sofa and… watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

Tonight in Swingtown, those dirty, dirty Deckers are having a party to raise money for the legal defense of Harry Reems, the real-life star of the adult film Deep Throat, who is being prosecuted by the Nixon Administration -- in an effort to distract the public from the Watergate scandal, says Sexy Bunny Lady Lawyer Sylvia (the vibrant Erin Daniels, who played Dana on The L Word). Susan unwittingly accepts the invite to Trina's party, unfamiliar as she is with Mr. Reems' oeuvre. Once the cat is out of the bag, though, courtesy a nude cardboard cut-out of Reems -- with detachable "censored" black bars -- Susan wrestles with the same issues we all do when it comes to pornography and censorship, and eventually decides to both see the film in question and go to the party anyway, whether Bruce likes it or not.

Bruce's reaction to Susan's act of defiance is probably the most interesting revelation of the episode. Repeating a theme of the show, Bruce seems more than willing to explore swinging, and all its implications, but he most definitely wants to do it in private, where it's hidden from public eyes. Just like Susan's wallpaper graffiti. I have to admit that I find the see-sawing openness of the Millers to be a tad annoying. One week Bruce is pushing Susan into a group shower at the cabin, and the next he forbids his wife to go to a party because "it's pornography." More significantly, Bruce bristles at the idea that Susan has "all these opinions," and is making choices, a theme presented with the added political weight of the abortion debate.

Oh, my stars! Janet left her Tupperware at home and went to the porno party as well! To support Susan, she says, but it's clear that her pot-induced breakthrough is having residual effects. She attempts to appear shocked and disgusted, but ends up getting charmed by Reems, and she and Roger have a nice moment where they semi-admit that they enjoyed the film. Later at home, inspired by the evening's screening, they get down to replicating its major themes.

B.J. and Rollergirl continued their sweet flirtation tonight, which includes her infatuation with Olympic gymnast Nadia Comaneci, and Nadia's mother, who must be better than her own blowsy mama, who shows up tonight to flirt awkwardly with Reems ("Linda Lovelace didn't exactly invent that move, you know," she slurs at him). Tonight's "'Tween Time in Swingtown" vignette culminates in B.J. presenting Rollergirl with her own 10.0, and I have to admit that my heart grew three sizes upon seeing B.J.'s toothy grin and the momentary joy it brought to the damaged Rollergirl's face.

Meanwhile, Laurie continued her semi-chaste affair with her hottie summer school teacher Mr. Stephens, capturing the attention of her boorish ex Logan, who attempts to blackmail Laurie into reconciling. Instead of taking the bait, though, she takes a page from her mother's book and doesn't allow a man to make her choices for her. By the end of the episode, as Helen Reddy's feminist anthem "I Am Woman" swells on the soundtrack, the two Miller women share a moment of sweet victory. "Way to go, Mom," Laurie says when she finds out that Susan went to the party. And Molly Parker's sunny face breaks into the most complicated and satisfying of smiles, conveying the pride she feels both in her daughter's admiration -- and in herself.

A sidenote: Last week, I made a goofy, juvenile plea for Swingtown's characters to just GET IT ON already. I understand that some of you might have interpreted that to mean that I am a rube who has completely misunderstood the point of the show.

So let me explain.

First of all, I am a rube.

Secondly, I get that Swingtown isn't about sex, it's about freedom, and how tasting new freedoms affects these characters, in particular our shiny protagonists Susan and Bruce Miller. And so far, it has basically been an interesting journey. I do really like the show. I think the way it incorporates changing gender roles and the political context of the 1970s, for example, is innovative, definitely not your usual ironic, oh-dear-look-at-how-big-the-collars-are kind of tired nostalgia (see: That '70s Show).

That said, here's what I should have written instead. I think that Swingtown might pack more of a punch, might have more of an electric charge, if the Millers were more actively engaged in the swinger culture that the Deckers embrace so lustily. It's then that we'd really see, in a much more dramatic fashion, how their characters develop. Maybe I'm just being impatient (and maybe a little bit pervy too), but I think the sooner Swingtown pushes its little baby birds out of the nest of monogamy and definitively into the big, scary world of swinging, the sooner the show will truly become the summer fun we all want it to be.

(Also: I know a lot of big words, but meh sometimes just works.)

Next week: There's an auction, at which Janet (sporting a sassy new hairdo) writes a check that Roger can't cash because… he's been fired!

How did you like "Go Your Own Way"? And do you agree with me that more swinging might ultimately make for better drama?

Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Purchase selections from tonight's soundtrack at Last.fm

Four weeks in, and Swingtown is already demonstrating a staid sameness to each of the episodes, and I'm not very happy about it. Here's how it goes: The Millers have plans with the Thompsons (Fourth of July, dinner, Pigs in a Pickle), something goes awry, the Millers make new plans with the Deckers (a fourgy, a night at the Playboy Club, fondue), and then the Thompsons show up anyway, bringing with them all sorts of unintentional humor and dramatic tension.

Following this pattern, this week the three couples wound up together at the Millers' cabin on the lake. "Hey, I didn't know this weekend was going to be a threeway?" a lusty Tom snarked. The Thompsons arrived just in time to derail a planned group shower, and the subsequent fidgety posturing nearly made me sprain my eyes I was rolling them so vigorously. "We'll leave." "No, no, we'll leave." Come on, people, just GET IT ON ALREADY! In the name of KC and the Sunshine Band, somebody cue the damn bow-chicka-bow-bow music and let's SWING!

Remember last week when I said that I was eager for the inevitable moment when Janet loosened her girdle and breathed deep of the musky stench of freedom? Miriam Shor and Grant Show had a great scene that foreshadowed such a moment. "Have you ever seen a man split a log?" Tom flirted/asked. "Jan"'s flinching curiosity was pretty great, as she gasped and clutched her non-existent pearls in the face of Tom's macho swagger.

Despite my complaints, there was one ingredient to this week's episode that propelled the plot to a more satisfying place. That would be the marijuana that that saucy scamp Trina sprinkled into Janet's world-famous brownie batter. The lesson here: Drugs make everything better, kids!

As does Twister apparently. To the tune of Melanie's "Brand New Key" (also on the Boogie Nights soundtrack incidentally), the suggestive intertwining of bodies turned out to be the gateway drug to skinny-dipping, and thus the tension lifted. The gender-segregated sleeping arrangements -– "like a sleepover?" Janet chirped -- ensured that no hanky-panky would take place, and it's a good thing. Because when Janet woke up in the morning next to Trina, for a moment Old Janet was back, indicating that her metamorphosis isn't going to come easy.

The episode ended on a hopeful note as the three very different couples kibitzed over pancakes. It made me think that future episodes might be more integrated, leaving that much-derided story pattern behind.

The kids had stories tonight too, but, you know: meh. While her parents were off regressing, Laurie, the most confident teenage girl ever, seduced the Hottie Philosophy Teacher with a botched French dinner and a very grown-up noir marathon on PBS. "Why do all the powerful women have to be evil?" she asked. B.J., Ricky and Rollergirl broke into the Deckers' pool, and while Ricky sampled from the liquor cabinet, B.J. and Rollergirl mostly just exchanged meaningful looks and talked like TV writers.

Next week: Susan has to help Bruce change, which involves not leaving somewhere. Vaguest previews ever!

What do you think? Was I too hard on this "summer fun" TV lark? Or are you getting as ticked off as I am that a show about group sex is starting to become a bit formulaic? I remain optimistic, though, as the cast is top-notch, and the nostalgia factor still keeps it groovy for me. So I'll keep on truckin'. Will you?

Related:
•Swingtown's Grant Show Must Go On
•Video: Q&A with Grant Show


See full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Buy selections from the Swingtown soundtrack at Last.fm

This week's episode of Swingtown can be neatly summarized as a battle for the affection/attention of various members of the Miller clan. Let's size up the competitors:

God: Susan is feeling guilty about dipping her toe into the spouse-swapping pool and its aftereffects on her friendship with Janet. She's also peeved at her husband's penchant for exchanging meaningful kisses and business cards with casual female acquaintances. So she decides it's time for her family to get some religion. After some enforced grace over breakfast, Susan packs her clan off to church. Unfortunately, this scene seems to go nowhere. No epiphany is forthcoming, at least not a religious one.

Janet: After church, Susan asks Janet to help her plan a housewarming party she has apparently just decided to have in a ploy to get the hyper-organized Janet to hang out with her again. Janet commandeers the party, making it a square affair -- with corny ice-breaker games, old-fashioned music, and something called Pigs in a Pickle (pickles surrounded by cream cheese and deli meat, which, if Janet hadn't made it, would be a fairly suggestive dish). Her efforts to make the evening a success are cute and neurotic, but clearly misguided, as evidenced by the arrival of the new neighbors.

Trina: What's the sexier hors d'oeuvre: pickles and cream cheese... or hot cheese fondue? (Forget it -- don't answer that. It's like a creepy Rorschach test.) Trina literally Sterno-heated things up upon arriving at the party, gifting the aforementioned fondue set (perfect for kissing games!) and a voyeuristic video camera (perfect for those "more private moments," Trina purrs).

I know I keep describing Trina as predatory, but tonight it was like she and Tom were secret agents whose mission it was to infiltrate enemy territory, so to speak. Much props go to Lana Parrilla, whose performance is so enjoyable that I am blushing less and less as the weeks go by and rooting for her to succeed. (Is that weird?) Over a precariously piled plate of Swedish meatballs, Trina confronted Janet about, of all things, when to serve hot hors d'oeuvres. Initially, I thought this was a bad move on Trina's part, since alienating Susan's old friend could backfire. But it's clear that this confrontation needs to happen. Trina won't get Susan back in her bed without making nice-nice with and/or minimizing the influence of Janet.

There was a promising moment of cuisine détente, as Trina complimented Janet on her Rosy Perfection Salad (what a name!), but methinks that Trina and Janet won't be exchanging anything more than recipes for the time being. But are you as hopeful as I am for that inevitable moment when Janet's careful veneer cracks, and she embraces the Me Decade fully?

In the meantime, though, the mounting tension between Susan's friends provided her an excuse for a "breakthrough," tearing the much-hated wallpaper from the dining-room wall and asking her guests to autograph the blank wall before they repaper it. It was a very symbolic gesture: Susan wants to partake in all the bawdy graffiti this activity yielded, but ultimately she wants it to be hidden from the public.

Roger: In previous episodes, Roger has seemed intrigued by the Deckers and their extracurricular activities, but when he catches Bruce in an innocent kiss with Trina, he is uncharacteristically judgmental, especially when Bruce 'fesses up to their Independence Day fourgy. I suppose Roger's attitude could be justified by his obvious crush on Susan, but I thought his reaction to learning of his best friends' experimentation would be less "Janet" and more "Trina."

Hottie Teacher: Laurie Miller spent this episode co-organizing a prison-literacy book drive with her hottie summer-school teacher, Mr. Stephens -- that is, Doug. Oh, and kissing him! Teach looks like he's about 17 so they make an undeniably cute couple, but how will this awkward development play out once they're back in a classroom setting?

Samantha (aka Mini-Rollergirl): Could this storyline move any more slowly? Cokehead Mom gets some action at the party, leaving Sam to fend for herself when Ricky is again all jealous of and nasty about B.J.'s burgeoning friendship with (yucky!) a girl. I like the dynamic between B.J. and Samantha, and I look forward to the day when she might have some reason to, you know, smile for a change.

Sylvia and Brad: At the 11th hour, though, it's Sylvia, the Sexy Bunny Lady Lawyer and her husband, Brad, the Soulful Shrink, who sweep in and capture the Millers' attention, most pointedly by leering as Susan draws a blank, curtained window on the denuded wall. When Susan asks Brad what he sees when he looks at her, the psychia-tryster improvises a seductive caricature of Susan, and the trio share a flirty giggle and a blush at the suggestive situation. As a result, this time it's Susan on the receiving end of Sylvia's business card, as the ladies agree to have lunch. Or maybe dinner! And maybe Sylvia will wear her bunny tail!

In the face of such rigorous seduction Olympics, Susan and Bruce are powerless, agreeing to nullify their one-time-only pact (that was a very short-lived pact, thank God!), to make their marriage completely open, at least when it comes to communication. "All options on the table," Susan says. The natural first step in this process is to film themselves having sex, which they promptly do. Bad idea! Haven't these people heard of Paris Hilton? Oh wait, I guess they haven't.

Next week: Twister! Boy, that Trina can turn any activity into an entrée for sex, can't she?


Still on board the Swingtown Express? Which character is most like you? Explain. Sadly, I think I'm kind of a Roger, both intrigued by and afraid of the questions raised by the show's titillating relative morality. Time for therapy!

Host your own key party! Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Buy selections from the soundtrack of tonight's episode at Last.fm

This week's episode of Swingtown began as Trina and Roger and Tom and Janet paired off in Janet's spotless kitchen over hot apple pie and to the dulcet tones of Blue Swede's "Hooked on a Feeling." Heh -– it's a dream sequence, of course, but what a nice surprise to find out it was Janet's dream sequence. If this kooky show sticks around, I am eager to see how Janet's repression eventually, you know, expresses itself.

Captain Tom has been promoted to the Tokyo route, as a result of a loose-lipped Tammy, who spilled more than coffee when she told the other girls at the airline about her playtime with the Deckers. Which means –- "with all these women-libbers out there," as Tom's boss puts it -– they need to be separated. The Tokyo route will mean more time away from home, and though Trina is supportive, you can tell she's not crazy about the idea. What kind of trouble will the Deckers get into when they're left to their own separate devices? I'm seeing some geishas in Tom's future.

"We are not swingers," says Susan to Bruce, eliciting a promise from her husband that their fling with the Deckers was a one-time thing. (The audience laughs heartily.) Bruce agrees to the pact, and it's cute to see how amused they are with their dirty little secret.

We have credits this week! They remind me of VH1's I Love the '70s and the theme song, "Give It Up For Love," sounds a lot like rocker chick Liz Phair, who is scoring the series.

Trina is on her morning jog/hunt, and just happens to bump into the Millers to tell Susan that she left an earring over at their place after the "party." (Nudgenudge.) She invites herself to spend the day with Susan, which includes sexual terrorism at the grocery store ("Hey Susan, buy one, get one free," chirps Trina, as she cups twin melons that look like, well, you know...). Since it's TV, they run into Janet, who has been avoiding Susan since the party and cancels their weekly bridge night, claiming she has other plans.

This show is all about meeting new couples, so it was nice symmetry to see Janet and Roger having the worst dinner ever with the new (and insufferable) neighbors, while Susan and Bruce and Trina and Tom meet up with Sylvia and Brad Davis at the Playboy Club, where women are not only allowed, they're encouraged!

Sylvia used to be a Playboy Bunny when she was putting herself through law school. I thought this was kind of a funny wink to the all those strippers out there (I've heard) who tell you they're studying to be a veterinarian or something to get bigger tips. Since Swingtown is clearly trying to make a statement about the expression of freedom in the '70s, they need to have these Forrest Gump-like characters who witness important historical moments and/or represent social trends.

So, tonight, Sylvia stands in for all women's libbers because she's (gasp) a lawyer who also apparently enjoys swinging. Paul Hincamp, the insufferable neighbor, on the other hand, represents all that remained conservative in the 1970s, a Communist-fearing, anti-Carter crank who doesn't allow his wife to speak. Paul was a nice foil for Janet, who seemed to be the only one in the room who didn't realize what a putz he was. I think it's clear where the writers' loyalties lie. Yay, Playboy Bunny lawyer lady!

B.J. and Rollergirl forge a weird kinship tonight when he brings some additional provisions to her runaway campground. They exchange meaningful looks and Samantha talks about her MIA-in-Vietnam dad. When B.J. tells her that her mom's fella appears to have left her, and –- more importantly –- that her mom doesn't seem to have noticed that she has run away, Sam returns home, even more sullen than before. This girl needs a hug, huh? Ricky pops up for moral support, but isn't so fond of "crazy" Samantha, which is unsurprising.

Laurie Miller (or Mini Ali MacGraw, as I like to call her) goes downtown to see a feminist version of Waiting For Godot with Logan. He makes fun of the play, embarrassing Laurie in front of her dreamy philosophy teacher and his playwright girlfriend. While it's true that Logan is a chump of the first order, I'm kind of with him on his theater review: That play looked terrible.

And that's basically it. Not a lot happened. There were a lot of foreshadow-y details that appear to be setting up the coming episodes. Roger and Susan had another breathless, mutually admiring conversation at the train station, where we learned that he liked the swingers' party, and also liked Susan's dress. I'm hoping this week's big reveals -– in particular, that lady-lawyer business card that Susan found in Bruce's trousers –- will yield some interesting payoffs in the weeks to come. Also, it's clear that the Deckers –- certainly Trina, who caressed Susan's earring with the same intensity that she did her hand last week -– would like to have more than Quaalude-free evenings out with the Millers, so how long do you think that pact is going to last?

Next week: Fondue party! With kissing other people's spouses!

Don't be a square: Watch full episodes of Swingtown in our Online Video Guide

Buy selections from this episode's soundtrack at LastFM

So, are we still on board the Swingtown Express? It's true that this week's episode was definitely a local train, slow as it was, but I'm still sticking in there for now. How about you?

A lot of you, like me, commented on the music from the pilot episode of Swingtown, which I thought was fantastic, very evocative. (Incidentally, the series is being scored by rocker chick Liz Phair, a childhood friend of the show's creator.) Since the music seems so integral to establishing the mood of the show, I'm going to try to do one of these YouTube playlists for each episode. Much more fun than aimless browsing, no? Enjoy!

•"Spirit in the Sky" by Norman Greenbaum

•"Higher and Higher" by Rita Coolidge

•"Golden Years" by David Bowie

•"Get Closer" by Seals & Crofts

•"Come and Get Your Love" by Redbone

•"Let Your Love Flow" by the Bellamy Brothers

•"Love Will Keep Us Together" by Captain & Tennille

•"Machine Gun" by the Commodores

•"Go Your Own Way" by Fleetwood Mac

•"Dream Weaver" by Gary Wright

•"I Can See Clearly Now" by Johnny Nash

Also: CBS is compiling selections from each episode and selling them at Lastfm.com/swingtown.