Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip

Well, everyone's pretty sure that this was the last we'll see of this show, not counting the chance NBC will burn off unaired episodes. So this is the last time I'll have to struggle to reconcile the elements I like about it — the intelligence and wit that made me want to cover it here — with almost weekly disappointment. Tonight's episode had equal elements of both.

"I get the irony," said the NBS lawyer played by Invasion's Kari Matchett, aka the ghost of canceled shows past. We're supposed to think she meant the irony of her defending the show from a sexual harassment case and then hitting on Matt. I think she meant the irony of her actually appearing as the angel of death.

A brief list of things that were great about this episode:
— The banter between Matt and Suzanne, especially the bit about why he can't make fun of softcore porn.
— Danny reminding Matt that when they took on this job, Matt promised him that Harriet wouldn't be a problem. "Did I say it in the same creepy little voice you just used?" Matt replied.
— The banter between Danny and Jordan about the scary baby doll who has taught them two important lessons: Don't put the baby in a Prada bag, and don't put the baby in a guillotine.
— Cal's confidence in that guillotine.
— Simon realizing the redhead he'd slept with wasn't the writer who's suing them.

Things that made me sadly resigned to the show's cancellation:
— The sudden way Luke turned into a total jerk on the set of his movie with Harriet. He was such a nice, sympathetic character, but the writers seemed to realize they needed to drag out the Harriet-Matt torture just a little bit longer. Or maybe Luke snapped, just like I did, and wanted to throttle Harriet for her wishy-washy guilt complex.
— The way we got just the slightest glimpse of the writers room, teasing us with the potential of a show about a show, and then promptly dropped it to dwell on Matt and Harriet some more.

I won't go on, because I don't want to kick those of you really mourning the show while you're down. I'm sorry it's going to be canceled, mostly because I'm sorry this wasn't the amazing show it could have been.

Huh. Who else was expecting a sweet, nostalgic look at the good old days of Matt and Harriet's relationship, something that would show us that they were once really good together, that all this agony has been worth it and they really should be together? Nope. Guess again.

What we got instead was Matt's bitter hallucination of the bad old days. Things actually might have been great between Matt and Harry, but this wasn't supposed to be what really happened: It was what the drugs and his bitter mood made him think happened. Tricky, right? Also, disappointing. In the beginning, Matt's head tells us that everything was exactly the same, except it was set to Eagle Eye Cherry's "Save Tonight," and other 1999 hits we've since forgotten. Matt's aggressive pursuit of Harriet was (again) creepy and offensive, not at all charming. Even if he hadn't attacked Christian evangelicals from the start, he admitted to watching her audition video many, many times, and to risking another week without a sketch on the air just for her. Yep, I would have gone for Luke, too. And not just 'cause he was much cuter.

I'm mildly intrigued by this whole drug thing, though. First, though, I'm going to need a primer on all these "Class 2" narcotics he's taking. All I know is they must be some sort of uppers. If any of you reading this can fill me in further, please do. Prescription meds aren't exactly my specialty. Although once Matt had that conversation with Diana Valdez, it did clear up one thing for me: I'd spent the first half hour of the show going, "Who the hell is that sappy singer?" Of course they had to make someone fictional for a plot like that. According to NBC.com, she was actually a singer/actress named Gina La Piana. Here's her MySpace page. Anyway, so Matt's taking enough pills to make him imagine the ghost of writers' past. I wonder if this is going to wind up in some sort of medical emergency that will make Harriet realize she loves him after all?

One thing about this episode: I've totally come around to the Jordan-Danny thing. They changed the dynamic back to being all about their banter. No more squishy romance. No more tortured souls. Thank you! This is actually a fun relationship to watch.

If there are a bunch of great lines and quotes you'd like to recall, I'm leaving it up to you. There's no heat in my apartment tonight, and I need to go huddle under the covers now!

Harriet summed up more than just Matt's behavior toward her there. It's also a good description of the situation with the animal wrangler, and the way Tom and Kim were used as pawns in Jack and Zhang Tao's larger plans.

The Harriet-Matt argument was definitely the most painful of them all. For me, the worst part of it was that they were at a banquet full of press and otherwise nosey people and yet still managed to have a fight above a whisper while Natalie freakin' Cole was performing. Classy! As much as I usually agree with Matt's protests against Harriet's causes, he was being such an insulting jerk blaming everything on her ("You're not borderline retarded") and kept twisting the knife ("If we had been able to go six months without an eruption like this, we'd be shopping for preschools") that I found it hard to believe they'd ever been happy together. And I guess we'll see if that's the case next week. If they get back together again after that, I think I'm calling the Humane Society.

And in this corner, we have another example of something disguised as cuteness: Jordan and Danny on the roof. OK, it did finally get cute. If I hadn't seen the episode with all the phone calls and the letters of recommendation, I would have really enjoyed the scenes on the roof this week. Maybe I would have even bought the fact that there was a Hide-a-Key rock up there all that time, or that Jordan couldn't think of a socially acceptable word for the guy sleeping in the dumpster. I liked the little details we discovered about Jordan: her field-hockey prowess (though how that makes someone good at throwing things is beyond me) and her little magic trick. But sorry, that kiss at the end lacked chemistry. And I couldn't help but think that this would not do either of them much good in their careers.

Again, my favorite part of the night involved the Jack-Tom-Kim-Zhao story (guest-starring Simon and Lucy), from Simon and Tom's exchange when Kim passed out — "It was the tequila." "Thanks, Hawkeye." — to Jack's many insults to everyone around — "Things I don't care about." "Life's full of disappointments and [Tom taking his pants off] would surely be one of them." That Prairie Oyster drink didn't remotely sound like something that would help Kim, unless the goal was to get her to throw up all that tequila. But it provided a rare moment of bonding between Kim and Jack, in which we learned that Kim could play the Vivaldi Viola Concerto in A minor when she was 7 (cool! I played that in 11th grade), and that Jack and his oft-forgotten wife are separated. The crowning moment, though, was the revelation that Kim's dad actually knows how to speak English and was just messing with everyone.

As for all those animals in the basement and the hating on the Humane Society lady, can't the show sue the animal wrangler? Did it not occur to anyone that this was an inhumane situation? Those poor animals are sitting in that basement scared to death of each other, and now there's going to be construction debris everywhere. I wonder if any of the SNL digital shorts have caused this much trauma.

As much as I have my doubts about Jordan's ability as a network president, I think she's a hell of a lot smarter than the execs at NBC who decided not to move Studio 60 away from this time slot following Heroes. It is such an abrupt mood swing to go from comic-book-geeky fun to talky romantic comedy. I think I'd be much more generous in any criticism of the latter if I weren't still hyped up about the appearance of George Takei. And Masi Oka's 20-second guest stint at the Studio didn't help matters.

But back to Jordan. Amanda Peet and Steven Weber have an interesting chemistry going on there. I don't want it to go anywhere — certainly not in stalker-Danny territory — I just like it as a dynamic work relationship. Perfect example of the interactions I love on this show: Jordan suggesting to Jack the exact plan he'd come up with to use Macao against the board, and Jack not missing a beat with his reply, "I'm, like, 20 hours ahead of you." And then when she caught herself relaying a boring story about Harriet's dinner, his wry response: "Wow, did I think that would go on for a while." Jack was pretty on with Tom, too, impressing upon him the ridiculous nature of his task with just the slightest hint of irony, so that Tom couldn't tell if Jack really meant that "the fate of Western civilization" rested on his date with Kim. How weird is it that this suit is suddenly my favorite character on the show?

How cool would it have been if the snake handler Cal hired was Manny Puig, the snake handler from Jackass and Wild Boyz. Though I don't think Manny would have lost a viper. This was a nice little side story to keep us distracted, and probably to appease those of us who've been wondering what happened to the show within the show while everyone who works there has been paying more attention to their love lives. Or, in the case of Darius and Simon, a well-intentioned but now totally dysfunctional mentor-student relationship. Poor Darius. He was bullied into taking this job in the first place, only a week before most of the writing staff abandoned ship. Sure, it probably wouldn't have hurt him to do Simon's Fruit of the Loom ad, but you can't blame the guy for trying to make sure he's not pigeon-holed.

As for Tom, does he realize he just took love-life advice from Matt? Lucy, who's so timid in the workplace, would have understood the whole Jack-Kim-Macao situation. Matt's "the only thing in that sentence that means anything is 'another woman' crap" is the same line of thinking that's getting him dumped without actually being in a relationship. OK, might as well open that can of vipers, too. First of all, don't attack me, Catholic readers, but would an event about Catholics in media (or anyone in media, for that matter) attract all that red-carpet press and look that glitzy? And attract all those beautiful people? And what would a 15-year-old professional snowboarder be doing bidding on Harriet and supporting teen abstinence? Interesting work of fiction. But I buy it, just because it was the slap in the face that Matt needed after all his immature games. Tom, are you listening here?

And finally, let's step out on the roof for a brief word with... BANG! Saw that one coming a mile away, but at least Danny acknowledged that his and Jordan's predicament was a textbook romantic comedy situation. And thank you, Jordan, for pointing out that Danny was going over-the-top Sorkin by turning his "one sheet" rant into something about how we elect presidents. I really don't want this to turn into Jordan finally relenting and admitting she likes Danny. I'm counting on that coyote to save the day.

After all these weeks away, tonight's episode made me feel like I'd come back from Christmas vacation and discovered my furniture had been ever so slightly rearranged. I believe Aaron Sorkin and Co. have felt the pressure from critics and their own Jack Rudolphs to tone down the political rhetoric and pay more attention to the characters and their relationships. In some respects this has worked; not so much in others.

What is working nicely: The politics have moved to a more appropriate setting — the boardroom of NBS' parent company, where we can believe that these people's opinions on censorship and war actually matter. Jack's arguments about wartime freedom of speech rang true, and I didn't feel like telling him to lighten up. Plus, Ed Asner's still totally charming as Wilson White. The elements of fiction fit in nicely with this realism, too. I'm not sure if in the real world someone of Jack's experience would accidentally call the chairman of the board a moron — it was like a bit of Jordan had rubbed off on him. And then, the New York Times Arts & Leisure section and the Juilliard Orchestra to the rescue! Ever since that Nevada episode, I like the idea of Jack going off on his own mini-adventures to save the network.

Jordan's battle with her new VP of alternative programming was interesting to me, but not because of that old debate about reality TV. I'm a huge fan of the genre, and you're not going to convince me that just because Temptation Island was ever made, The Amazing Race and Project Runway are not quality shows. But these scenes did offer a good character study of Jordan and showed how her own prejudices and impulsive manner can work against her. I'm convinced of one thing, though: No woman had a part in writing this episode. It seemed like what men imagine women to be like in the workplace with each other: catty, competitive, in need of a man to settle things between them. Hallie's "Uh-oh, there's another pretty girl at the dance, and this one's not pregnant" made me want to spit and wish I was actually back in a class at my women's college. At least Jordan came to her senses and decided to be the bigger person. She might find wisdom yet in those "48 Rules of Ripping Off Machiavelli," or whatever they were called.

But I have a bigger problem with the men in this episode. Why do all of them treat dating as a slightly milder form of stalking? Danny's "persistence" with Jordan rapidly escalated from cute to annoying to creepy to sad. But how is he to know any better? He hangs out with Matt, who apparently hadn't made a move after that amazing backstage kiss but got into an obsessive bidding war for a date with Harriet at the Catholic Media Awards. I thought that kiss meant we were done with this agony. Sure, I love watching Matthew Perry get all flustered and fast-talky. Can't we just see him be that way in a relationship for a while? Harriet had a better flustered argument line than he did this time: "Luke has more romanticness in his whole body than you have in your little finger!"

At least Tom got it right. Surprising, since he, too, decided to go to Matt for advice. And I was scared he was going to go into creepy mode when he was hemming and hawing in front of Lucy. But instead, he pulled through and got those words out. And Lucy became my favorite character of the night when Tom came into Matt's office just after she'd asked for time off for their date: "I was here to correct my grammar, my spelling, my sketch, to get the night off." Looks like this sincere romance is going to have to wait while Jack executes his plan to save the network — and the freedom of the press — one Juilliard violist at a time.

I could kill the promo people at NBC for making me think tonight's episode was going to be sickeningly schmaltzy. I mean, sure, the show upped the romance quotient quite a bit, and there was even a very special message about New Orleans, but not once did it match that terrible, over-the-top Christmas Miracle crap they blathered about in the ads. Instead, it was so completely engaging, I forgot to take notes half the time, and thus have no smart quotes to relive with you right now. I think the writers are finally taking critics' advice and deciding to concentrate more on letting us get to know the characters than on impressing us with all the witty, meaningful things that come out of the characters' mouths (spit takes don't count).

And how interesting that we began the episode at the doctor's office, with Jordan — the very woman who's supposed to be letting the press get to know her rather than all the incredibly smart and stupid things that come out of her mouth — and Danny, adorably trying to play the part of the supportive, protective male friend. Jordan's got to have a hormone-addled brain if she didn't notice his hopeful puppy-dog eyes. You've gotta love all the gender reversal on this show: The guys are all sensitive and wearing their hearts on their sleeves, while the women get to play it cool (well, quirky cool) and reveal only as much as the situation calls for. Then again, maybe Jordan would be able to show a lot more if her mouth weren't always full. I worry for Danny, though. Jack seems to be more her type: bad for her. And he's been redeeming himself a lot lately. I think Jordan's having a good influence on her boss these days, making him grow a backbone and fight for the newscasters' right to air a soldier cursing while under fire.

Matt was pretty cute himself, with all his Jewish Christmas cheer. As a non-Christian myself, I'm with him: Celebrating the holiday, with all the silly decorations and the Bing Crosby, can still be fun and heartwarming, even if you miss the point about Jesus. So he was all inspiring Cal to shave coconuts and bring in ancient creepy Santa statues, while Simon, Tom and the writers were all trying to bring Christmas down, courtesy of Internet debunking sites. When Tom and Simon were falling over themselves trying to impress Lucy with their bizarre trivia ("I'm an astronomy buff.... " "The word is loser!"), it was a nice parallel to Matt's and Danny's girl troubles. But I'm so glad Matt seems to be done with the courtship games. He made exactly the right move: acted supportive, not jealous, when Luke, the director Harriet used to date, hired her for a movie. Then he finally stopped all his useless pining and swept her off her feet. Now, I've run hot and cold about this relationship for the past few weeks, but that kiss was hot. I was right there with Harriet and her Freudian "and I'm Matt" slip during "News 60."

In case you're curious about that whole New Orleans musician subplot — and by the way that trumpet player blurted out his lines, you knew he had to be a real guy, not an actor — NBC explained it on their site: They are all real-life beneficiaries of Tipitina's Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to rebuilding the New Orleans music scene. And wow, did they send chills up my spine.

So it seems that these writers (I mean the real show's writers, not poor Lucy and Darius) are 10 times more brilliant without the constraints of linear storytelling; that is, they tell a much better story when they can play with time a bit. Witness the two-part Nevada Day story, and now this. At first, I was worried that the turkey got to my brain over the weekend when they started talking about Martha's column and the five dead in Grosse Pointe. But it's amazing how quickly you get used to the flashback-and-forward rhythm if it's done well. And if it's mercifully free of speeches about Harriet's religion!

Really, these are the kind of behind-the-scenes scenes I've been craving: The cast having a spit-take contest; Harriet's real disability when it comes to reciting a joke (I have the exact same problem!); what they have to do when they get sick before a show (I need to get me some of that B-12). All that and, lo and behold, the show within the show opened with a really funny sketch — Danny making Howie Mandel play Deal or No Deal.

The situation in the writers' room was downright depressing for a while. How sad is it that Lucy had never had a sketch on the show? Sadder than the fact that the only former writer Matt could bring in was seriously downtrodden Andy? It's true, though, that when there's no pressure, it's 10 times harder to write something good. On the other hand, it's rather hard for me to imagine writing an entire sketch in 20 minutes, but I guess it helps if half the dialogue consists of spitting. I wonder if this situation explains some of those surreally bad sketches that wind up at the end of SNL.

The Martha-Danny storylet had some great little lines of dialogue, of course, but it also seemed like they were just rushing to wrap up the loose end from last month. Meanwhile, until she either hooks up with Danny or publishes that Vanity Fair article, she's adding nothing to the show, in my eyes.

Finally, there was Jordan's sorry attempt to save her job. As much as I usually enjoy her quips, I was cheering on that reporter for calling her on her constant need to answer serious questions with jokes. Why didn't the publicist try to coach her ahead of time? Did no one foresee that she'd eventually blow up at the guy? But none of these questions matters as much as the one still lingering: Who's Jordan's babydaddy?

Good lines, crackling chemistry, funny observations — everything we love about this show was present tonight. But I'm going risk the wrath of the blog commenters again and say there was something wrong here: The show hasn't yet earned the right to be this, well, meta. You have to be pretty darn satisfied with your own work as a writer before you write a scene in which writers have to be reassured that the episode they just wrote isn't crap. That's the very tip of the iceberg, too. Let's see if I can do this without making everyone dizzy:

— NBC announced just about a month ago that they'd be making budget cuts and would be laying off a bunch of staff. I'm guessing that happened right around the time this episode was being written about NBS' budget cuts. So I wonder if some Studio 60 people lost their jobs and this episode was an apology to them?

— The alternative to axing 15 people, Jordan says, is to resort to product placement. As she and Danny argue about this (and I must say, I really, really like these two together), we get to see just how hard it is to avoid even inadvertent product placement: The beer bottles they're drinking have no labels, and not a single brand is visible in the vending machine from which Danny buys a snack. But there were an awful lot of brand names mentioned during this debate, so conceivably, Nokia or Sony could have actually paid for it. Just kidding.

— There were also a couple of instances in which you could have sworn the characters were talking about the episode, rather than what was going on in the episode. In Matt's office, while the guys are paying attention to a basketball game, Matt's crisis of confidence and Jordan's budget request, she finally says, "We've got a couple too many things going on at once." Then at the end of the second overlong scene in which Simon and Tom try to talk Harriet out of posing for a magazine in lingerie, Simon concludes, "And it only took us half an hour to get there!" And when Danny gets obnoxious about Jordan's Gibson-guitar placement suggestion, she mutters, "Oh, how I love the Eastern witty boys!" These are all cute, funny comments, and well spoken by the actors. I just get this feeling that it's all a preemptive line of defense. Like, "Ha! You can't make this criticism because we already have!"

There were some chinks in the armor, though, and that's when things got good again. I loved watching Lucy's insecurity about her skills, and her outrage at Ricky's sexist comments. And as much as I'm tired of the sanctimonious Harriet story, Matthew Perry made me like her again with his tender speech at the cactus table. Few actors can switch from sarcastic and dry to loving and melancholy as seamlessly as he can.

I'm pretty sure Aaron Sorkin revealed his philosophy about the show to us in Jordan's speech to Danny: He's running this series as if he's got only one year to live. He's going to talk about all the things he's always wanted to, without worrying about ratings or critics or making enemies in Hollywood. He's made peace with the fact that this show probably won't make it past one season, affluent viewers be damned. So I guess that means we've just got to brace ourselves for a bumpy, yet still enjoyable, ride.

After last week's flurry of activity, tonight's conclusion kind of gave us a chance to catch our breath and sink our teeth into a bit more character development. Alhough I couldn't help feeling that most of the fun stuff had already happened, and that we'd spent the better part of this hour in denouement territory.

Speaking of characters, John Goodman's Judge Bobby Bebe was delightful. He was having a blast putting Jack and "Matlock" in their place while letting Tom enjoy some pie. I even think the way he was asking Simon about the "deadbolts" in his hair was another clever jab at assuming they'd assume he was ignorant and racist. But once he got his point across (OK, once he got it across several hundred times), that he thinks Studio 60 is elitist and anti-Middle America, he was actually a nice, understanding guy. Well, would he have been as nice and understanding if the ADA hadn't noticed Tom's military bracelet? We'll never know. I love how so many people were coming up with all these salacious stories about Tom and Simon being lovers, when the truth was that Tom was with his war-hero brother. (I assume he was speeding to get his brother away from the protesters, or maybe he was by himself and upset about his brother? That part wasn't made entirely clear.)

Back at the studio, while everyone was scrambling to replace Simon, Tom and Danny, they were uttering some great lines. There was Jeannie's "Is Tom in jail or in a Marx Brothers movie?", but that did kind of sounds like the episode's writers are patting themselves on the back for having created a scenario worthy of the Marx Brothers. Though I don't encounter too many blatant homophobes in my everyday life, I hope that when I do, I can somehow tell them, "I want to hit you on the head with Liberace." I still find Harriet's quote inexcusable. If she truly believes the whole "judge not lest ye be judged" bit, then why say the first part about sin at all? And I wanted to hug Jordan for her response to Harriet's saying she was touring with the right-wing Christians to show people Christians can have nicer voices than Ann Coulter: "Carol Channing has a nicer voice than Ann Coulter." This story line with Harriet's ideology is getting old. Then again, if that last scene means she and Matt are getting back together, the sparks could really fly. First, I think he should hook up with British Office's Lucy Davis, just to keep things interesting.

PS: Hoorah to NBC for pulling a Jack Rudolph and picking up the show for a full season!

Now this is why we're watching this show. When all that talk is actually serving a viable plot in an interesting structure, it just sparkles. I am entertained, not lectured. Brilliant! Not that doing a flashback is all that original, per se, but Tom's series of mishaps got more interesting with every detail filled in on the way back to the opening scene with grumpy John Goodman in Pahrump, Nevada.

Maybe the fact that the Chinese billionaire's daughter, Kim, is a viola player softened me up for all that praise. Being the butt of all musician jokes, underdog of the orchestra, can make we violists (and former violists) very excited at the slightest acknowledgement. Even if it's still poking fun at the poor instrument. Come to think of it, it's pretty logical that a viola player is a big Tom Jeter fan, rather than going for some more obvious star. Tom is really starting to become three-dimensional as a character, and his relationship with Simon is quite endearing. Maybe Simon's protective nature is what inspired Tom to play bodyguard to Harriet. Harriet is even more naive than Jordan when it comes to the press, isn't she? Oh my, Page Six quoted me out of context and painted me as the bad guy to sell more papers! How could they do such a thing? I don't think her quote that homosexuality is a sin is made all that better by adding that it's not her job to judge. Matt's graphic response said it all, "Does your ass hurt from straddling the fence all the time?" I'm still having a hard time buying Matt as a Jew, but I'll let it slide 'cause it's an easy way to introduce more conflict.

"Standards and Practices Jesus" was one of the funnier skits we've seen them create for the show. A good balance of puns and satire is always a good basis for TV humor, I think. And speaking of comedy gold, the "cast of a Fellini film" (as Matt so aptly called them) on their way to Nevada were just getting warmed up, weren't they? There was Jack trying to be human, except his solution to everything was to wave around the magic black AmEx card. There was Danny, who may actually have been on the verge of losing his ever-present cool, but you could only tell by the extra wrinkle in his forehead. Meanwhile, Simon was hopping around telling everyone who'd listen about the joint in the jacket. I don't think Tom should be too mad at Daisy the basset hound; if she hadn't found the pot, I'm sure Simon would have let it slip soon enough on his own. "Did you have three years of law school this morning?" Tom finally asked the unusually hyper Simon. No wonder the Chinese mogul and his daughter didn't mind the extra stop in Nevada; I'd want to watch the whole thing unfold, too. Unfortunately, Judge John Goodman isn't as amused as we are. Though he did make himself laugh by pretending he didn't know what NBS was. Something tells me this wasn't the first time a Hollywood type was caught speeding in Pahrump. I can't wait to find out the mysterious reason Tom was speeding.

Back at home, Jordan seems less and less fazed by the lies released by her ex-husband. "You don't like kids or dogs?" "Yeah, or orphans. Is that a problem?" I, however, am impressed by how good Amanda Peet is looking with just the slightest bit of pregnancy weight. I cannot fathom how it'll be worked into the story. I think they've got time to play around with that, though. Let's cross our fingers that the rumors of Studio 60's demise have been greatly exaggerated.

You know there's something wrong when there's a major party going on and Jack Rudolph is the only one whoopin' it up. Wow, do I feel sorry for these guys. Their work week is finally over, but they all somehow find a new project to work on right away.

Jordan's task was certainly challenging. With a few celebratory drinks in her already, she wanted to make Studio 60 her "dome of pleasure"/Fortress of Solitude, in order to hide from Jack. Once that was deemed impossible, she barged into the women's dressing room asking Harriet, Jackie and Samantha if they'd be her friends. So make that more than a "few" drinks. Then she set about trying to hunt down a baseball to get an autograph from Harriet's pitcher? (Am I crazy, or is this guy not even close to good-looking?)

Matt and Simon skipped out on the party entirely in order to hunt down a black writer for the show. Something tells me that if the waitresses Danny picked out for Matt had been able to stroke his ego a bit, Matt would've been able to postpone the trip. But when Willie Wilz turned out to be about as funny and fresh as Martin Lawrence, it turned into a dramatic, very special moment with Simon. His story was a bit clichéd, if you ask me. And to remedy the situation, the two decided to bully Mr. Flop Sweat (whose name I don't believe was ever mentioned) into becoming their writer. No meeting, no résumé, no additional material necessary. Sounds like a sweet job interview to me.

And in this corner, we have Tom versus his ignorant Midwestern parents. Just when you think the show can't alienate anyone else, they come with this little exchange: Simon: "Are they alive?" Tom: "They live in Columbus, Ohio, so hardly." Also, was Tom an NBS tour guide before he landed the show? That was an awful lot of obscure network trivia he rattled off there. So how did people who'd never heard of Abbott and Costello wind up with a kid in comedy? The writers tried to redeem the situation by the end, having the dad's scornful exterior mask his sadness over their other son in the army, and making Tom just a little more understanding of his stereotypical parents. Still, the whole situation struck me as condescending.

On the other end of the spectrum, though, was this plot with Cal and the Alzheimer's dude. It left me rather confused. Was he faking the Alzheimer's, or did his memory only work for stories of blacklisting? And what was that thing about the names he gave being an anagram for the big 10? Seriously over my head.

One more thing I need explained: Matt called Lauren Graham's show "Calico Girls" — so is that an inside joke or what? Oof. I'm gonna miss the show when it takes a break next week, but my brain seems to need the rest!

I have a hard time believing that Martha can interview all those very talkative people without a tape recorder or a notebook. Vanity Fair's fact checkers must have a ball confirming her quotes. I wish I had her memory, I'm taking notes while watching this TV show, and I still miss a whole lot of good lines. Sure, it's supposed to be a strategy to get people to open up, but I think if I were the interviewee, I'd spend my whole time worried that she'd remember something wrong — kind of like when waiters promise you they don't need to write down your orders and inevitably bring you the wrong dish.

My theory about Harriet's really drawn-out, dull sob story about growing up with her poor, religious mother: She was trying to distract Martha with boredom. That's what she did to me. Seriously, the pacing was all off in that scene, and I'm not sure it was saved by Sting's lute performance. I did, however, get my obscure pop-culture lesson of the night: Judy Holliday. (Now I know Raven and Maitland will let me have it in the morning for not knowing who she was, but oh well.)

So I'm torn about the B-story with Jordan, the sleazy reality show and the promising U.N. series. Problem No. 1: I have a hard time believing the U.N. series could ever be as interesting as she promises. Problem No. 2: If a show about the inner workings of a TV show is having trouble finding an audience, Jordan really has her work cut out for her with "Nations." Problem No. 3: Ashamed to say this, but I probably would tune in to "Search and Destroy," at least once. In fact, why isn't this a show already? But it was good to see proof that Jordan's job entails more than hanging around Studio 60, and I'm still kind of getting a kick out of Steven Weber's mustache-twirling villainous chairman act. It's as if Sorkin and Schlamme are living out a little revenge fantasy with his character, and every victory of Jordan's is a wish fulfilled. Also, they got Lou "I hate spunk" Grant himself, aka Ed Asner, to play head honcho Wilson White.

How adorable is Tom (Nate Corddry)? He really meant well last week with the Bombshell Babies plan, and this week when he gallantly tried to protect Suzanne and Matt but wound up digging the hole deeper. I'm confused, though. If Simon was miked the whole time Tom was filling him in on what not to say to Martha, doesn't that mean other people overheard them, too? As for the subject of their "hushed" conversation, Matt and Harriet, that last scene was perfect torture. "Fields of Gold" still makes me get misty-eyed about my high-school boyfriend; I can't imagine how Harriet had the self-control to pull away from an almost kiss with her very recent ex in the presence of Sting singing it live, with a lute.

Finally some mentions of the show within the show:

Pretty funny: the Nancy Grace skit.
Funny because it hits so close to home: "Jenny Doesn't Have a Baby." Reminder of why these writers should stick to dramedy: "Nicolas Cage Couples Counseling." And all you Gilmore fans out there must be relieved that tonight's two seconds of Lauren Graham were but a glimpse of her real guest stint at next week's "Wrap Party."

Let's just get this out of the way right now: Studio 60 is way better at dramedy than it is at sketch comedy, and I'm OK with that. Tonight is the perfect example. The strongest story line (of many) was between Matt and Harriet. Personally, I think she made a Freudian slip, giving Matt the bat with the pitcher's phone number. Deep down, she really did want him to know about her rebound relationship. She probably should have waited until after Friday's show, though. Matt's confusion about his own feelings was brilliantly infuriating. And why would a pitcher give someone a bat, exactly? I'm really glad they finally gave Nate Corddry (Tom) some more dialogue, and it was one whopper of a pedeconference (I just learned this Sorkinite term last week!). As Tom followed Matt for about a mile through the office, somehow he connected Harriet to his own ex, Paula, to the plays of August Strindberg to the lame plan for Matt to visit the Bombshell Babies (whom I originally thought were fictional Pussycat Dolls, but they're actually a real-life burlesque troupe. Leave it to Hollywood to turn out such skinny burlesque dancers, but I digress). Hate to admit it, but I only know of August Strindberg because of the absurd StrindbergandHelium.com cartoons from years ago. Watch them, they're way cuter and funnier than the "plagiarized" 90-second commentary from the writers' room. Maybe I'm just overly sensitive about ADD jokes, but I really wished that whole segment had been less obvious and Seinfeldish. I much preferred the "Juliette Lewis' Meet the Press" sketch. Actually, what I really preferred was watching how completely in love Matt looked when he watched the sketch. And this story wasn't all about those longing looks and clever literary references: It was a chance for Perry to give us two examples of his skills as a physical comedian, too (the bat to the window, the fall into the suit of armor).

This Christine Lahti/Vanity Fair story line should get good as it unfolds further. It did inspire the funniest and oh-so-wrong joke of the night, when Danny mentions the possibility of Marty witnessing drug use in the studio: "The Coneheads, Toonses the Driving Cat... think Belushi and Farley died of Lou Gehrig's disease?" Also, love that Danny picked up on the fact that Jordan probably told Marty to show off her assets. How very timely of Jordan to bring up the point about "alpha" consumers, the wealthier, more educated audience members who are five times more valuable to advertisers than average Joes. That is pretty much the argument for saving the real Studio 60, given the show's depressing numbers last week. I hope they're right!

It almost seems like Matt and Danny/Thomas and Aaron are listening in on our discussions. But the reality is even better: They anticipated the debates the first two episodes would stir and turned them into even more material for the show. So we're going to mention Sorkin's past with illegal drugs? Not before he gets to, and not just through cocaine-using Danny, but through Jordan and her DUI coming back to haunt her. (Bonus: He gets across the point that he only hurt himself by doing drugs, while drunk drivers often kill others.) And will we make some comparisons to this or that element of Saturday Night Live? Yes, right after the characters refer to them with reverence. (Is it true that "Wayne's World" debuted at 12:55? That's back when I used to tape SNL and rewatch it at least once.) Should we poke fun at the fact that they're doing Sorkin's signature walk-and-talk? Jordan thinks it's a good idea — "Can we have this conversation walking?" Think it's cute to mix up Studio 60 and 30 Rock? Tina Fey covered those bases in the promos for her show, too.

OK, I'm getting to a point here: They knew there would be complaints that this show about television is too political. Jordan asks Jack why party lines matter in entertainment. I found his 9/11 answer rather lame; this country's polarization was going on long before 2001. Then there was the echo of another question that's been asked in this very forum: Why not make fun of Democrats once in a while? The low-blow answer: They would, if only the Democrats would do something. As for the Christian stuff, I like where Harriet draws the line. The radical right, the hypocritical people in power and the witch-hunters of the past — laugh at them all you want. But maybe it's not so funny to laugh at the poor, small-town factory workers who might not recognize that Midsummer Night's Dream is way raunchier than Grease.

As much as I enjoy political discourse now and then, this show is at its strongest when politics are just one small ingredient in the real subject at hand: the creative process. I am really loving all the scenes in which Tom, Simon and Harriet brainstorm jokes. And I get a little thrill when Matt goes into inspiration mode at his desk. Then we get just a slight taste of the payoff: the montage of triumph during the show and at the after-party. Even though we don't see all the jokes, we celebrate with the cast and crew, because we've been with them from the beginning.

Unconnected observations:

- Even though I saw it twice in promos, I laughed again when Danny brings Jordan to Matt, saying she wants them to make fun of her. "OK, well, your teeth are pretty big."
- Danny's kinda sexy when he stands around chewing gum with an air of confidence.
- Jordan's thing about the ex-husband making her go to sex clubs was an awkward rip-off of that whole deal with Jeri Ryan and her ex.
- What was the deal with Simon not being into the blonde chick at the party? Maybe I'm reading into things too much.
- Sarah Paulson does a really good Holly Hunter impression.

This is going to be a tough show to write about. And that's not necessarily because of the warp-speed dialogue or the fact that by 11 on a Monday night, I really just want to go to bed (and the husband really wants to watch football). It's the fact that this is a smart show about television, which is naturally attracting a smart audience that loves television (and loves talking about television), so I know if I miss anything, you guys aren't going to let me forget it. So let me say this now: If I miss anything, I'm doing it on purpose to make you feel smart and important. (Matt's tone is rubbing off on me already!)

From the opening press-conference scene I was wary of one thing tonight: that the show assumes everyone watching has a vast knowledge of network/Hollywood politics. I hope that doesn't trip them up. Then again, someone who doesn't immediately understand about affiliates and the power of right-wing markets like Terre Haute will eventually pick up on the jist of the conversation in Jack's office: The bigwigs want Jordan to make Matt and Danny cut "Crazy Christians" so as not to offend the religious right; Jordan echoes Wes' argument from the first week that none of those people were watching in the first place. She also wants to flex her muscles a bit and show she's no meek lady exec. She's definitely my favorite character. Minutes after she stumbles, like that awful joke about being high when she hired Matt and Danny, she regains her footing, looks straight at her two recruits and says, "I raised the bar high? Sorry, clear it." She's not all Mary Richards, guys. Also, it's cute how she constantly gets people's names wrong.

Love the looming specter of the countdown clock, adorned with "Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana" (anyone know where that's from? Sounds very Groucho to me), in Matt's office. Even I was starting to feel stressed out about the show. Especially since it looks like Charlotte's shlubby husband/lawyer from Sex and the City had been running the lazy writing staff up until now, and apparently trying to make D.L. Hughley's Simon do Bill Cosby impressions (low blow at SNL's Kenan Thompson?). I hope Hughley and Nate Corddry get more screen time soon ? the few times I've seen Rob Corddry's little bro on The Daily Show, he's cracked me up. But so far, none of the "cast" gets to do much funny stuff, do they? It's all up to Matt and Danny to crack the nervous jokes. Not that I minded Danny's threatening speech to relax the writers or Matt's pep talk about a hot audience not laughing much. Their alternating good cop/bad cop banter is the meat of the show.

As for the ongoing tension between Matt and Harriet, let's just hope the "will they or won't they" doesn't get dragged out too long. I noticed a lot of talk in the blog about whether Harriet's character is meant to bash Christians. To me, she seems to be quite sympathetically written and multidimensional. The standard Hollywood liberal way would be not to include a character like her at all, and instead to treat all Christians as crazy outsiders. And in that clever opening musical number, she even has enough of a sense of humor (gasp) to point out the paradox of her presence on the show. If the pilot episode offended some Pat Robertson fans out there, they can change the channel and go back to blaming hurricanes and 9/11 on homosexuals. That's all I'll say on the matter. But by the way, do we even know if they used "Crazy Christians" in the show after all? How frustrating that we never get to see the actual skit!