Smallville

Well it's official now: Smallville exists outside the realm of Superman continuity. That's fine in my book; All-Star Superman has been the best ongoing comic since the character's inception, but this is a notion that should have been introduced much earlier in the series.

Tonight's episode kicked off with the obligatory recap, a segment that used to get me geared up for how awesome the finale would be. Not really this case this time.

So then it cuts to a scene of Edward Teague flying off to South America in a private jet in hopes of escaping the consequences of his recent attempt on Clark's life. Kara's managed to slip onto the plane as a flight attendant and goes all Jack Bauer on Teague before flying off to find Lex and the traveler-controlling device.

Given that Kryptonians are unwilling to recklessly murder humans and the fact that both Clark and Chloe are already aware that Lex is in possession of the device, the segment served as nothing more than obvious foreshadowing to the fact that “Kara” is really just Brainiac in disguise.

Lois shows up at the Kent farm to encourage Clark to apply for a job at the Daily Planet. Clark tells her he'd never work for Lex Luthor and she questions why the two of them used to be so close.

“Sometimes people aren't who you think they are,” he says, and sends her off with a warning to be careful.

Chloe shows up soon after to break the news about the private jet. Somehow, she's gotten her hands on the black box flight recordings, and thanks to his super-hearing, Clark learns that Karaniac was on the plane.

Clark refuses to believe Karaniac could have been responsible.

“Every Kryptonian you've met has turned out to be a cold-blooded killer.”
“She's my cousin! Not a killer! We need to find her.”

Clark tracks her down to the Luthor mansion, where Karaniac's found the traveler-controlling orb. She dismisses Clark's concerns over the deaths of those on the jet. Realizing she can't use it herself, she flies off to find Luthor, who's busy bullying Jimmy into tricking Lois that all Lex' secret expeditions have been nothing more than oil speculation.

When Karaniac gets to Lex, she reveals that she was the one who saved him from the dam, that as a fellow Kryptonian she once believed that Clark was destined to save the world, and now he is destined to destroy it. Because only a human can manipulate the orb, she sends Lex off to find the fortress, where he can put it to use.

Clark, who really should be more occupied with stopping Lex at this point, is pondering whether he should use kryptonite rock to take down Karaniac. Chloe walks in, and they decide that she's the only one who can use the kryptonite against Karaniac.

Of course, no one can use kryptonite on her, because she's really Brainiac in disguise. He reveals himself to Chloe, and tries to probe her mind the way he did with Kara and Lana in the past. She starts glowing and he quickly pulls out.

“What the hell are you?”

After finding Chloe in a coma, Clark rushes off to find Brainiac, who's killing time at the local power plant. He warns Clark that the only way he can save his friends is to kill him in cold blood. But, “You'd never take another man's life.”

Good thing Brainiac was a machine. Clark shoves an electrical line into his chest and he explodes into a million tiny pieces. We get a shot of Kara floating away in the Phantom Zone crystal.

Back at the hospital, Clark is relieved to find Chloe OK, but when he goes to check on Lana. She's gone, but left behind a tape for him to watch.

“I know we thought we were meant to be together Clark, but we were fooling ourselves. I need you Clark, but the world needs you more. As long as I'm in your life, I'm holding you back. Don't come after me.

I love you Clark, more than you will ever know.”

Lois, of all people, is there to comfort him.

“I'm so sorry,” she tells him, and for the first time in forever, I realize that a scene with Lana actually got to me. She's not usually that perceptive, or selfless, and seeing her pull off both in the same scene was the perfect send-off for her character.

Over at the Talon, Jimmy's stammering through an awkward proposal to Chloe. “I figured even if we didn't end up together, I'd be happy just knowing you were in the world. Today, I realized that wasn't true...no I mean, I'm happy you're in the world..you mean so much to me Chloe, I want to spend the rest of my time on earth with you.”

Before she can respond, the DSS busts in to arrest her. Seems like Jimmy's lame attempts to convince Lois about Lex' oil-drilling were about as successful as his later attempts to tell Lex he had no interest in lying to his friends. Oops.

Jimmy runs off to tell Clark, who finally realizes he should have spent a little more time going after Lex and a little less time moping over Lana and worrying about Kara. He rushes off to the fortress, where Lex is busy taking it all in.

“I must admit Clark, this is a big step up from the barn.”
“This isn't what you think Lex, you don't understand.”

Lex lashes out at Clark for plotting the earth's demise and points out that with everything Clark could do, Lex could have made him a hero.

“I'm sorry Clark, but you are the traveler. You hold the entire future of the planet in your hands, and I'm here to take it back.”

“Lex, don't!”

Lex does.

The fortress begins to shatter and collapse on top of them before everything disappears in a quick flash of light. This would have been a great way to end the series.

I'm really not sure where the writers are going to take the show next season, and with departure of Al & Miles, I doubt they do, either.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Unable to crack the key of the bizarre krytpograph he uncovered in Zurich, Lex has enlisted the help of a world-renowned antiques expert to help discover the secret of controlling the Traveler. Robert Langdon was apparently unavailable.

Lex' typically unassailable security is breached by the sole living member of Veritas, who manages to carve the symbol of the Traveler into Lex' chest, yet fails to kill him or recover the kryptograph, both of which would have been a much quicker, and easier, solution.

Jimmy, who's added “ambulance-chaser” to his ever-expanding repertoire, managed to snap a few pictures of the symbol before Lex escaped his brief stay at the hospital. After a bit of research, he learns that the marking is similar to ones that have appeared all over Smallville; in the Kawatche caves, in crop circles, on the side of the Kent family barn, etc.

When he points out that Lex has a similar obsession with these bizarre hieroglyphics, Chloe dismisses his assumptions that Smallville is a town of celestial import as nothing more than over-excited, paranoid delusions.

Of course, she wastes no time in passing off this information to Clark, which leads him to the “only church of St. Christopher, patron saint of lost travelers” on the continent, which happens to be located in Montreal. Look, I get that Smallville is shot in Canada, but to pretend this is the only church...never mind. What's important is this revelation led to a brilliant plug for Sprint.

Lex' security, meanwhile, is breached once again when the Zurich banker busts in on the antiques-expert, who's finally managed to decipher some meaning from the kryptograph. His goal seems to be the recovery of the device, and any questions of why he didn't just take it earlier are quickly disappeared when Lex shoots him in the back.

Lex and the antiquarian (yes, it's a real word) head off to the Montreal church in order to find... a clock. Apparently, Dr. Swan set up an incredibly complicated, globe-spanning puzzle (the sort which could only be appreciated by fans of old LucasArts adventure [url http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indiana_Jones_and_the_Fate_of_Atlantis]computer[/url] games in order to hide the Traveler-controlling device.

Clark's already beaten him to the punch, but when confronted by Teague, the aforementioned sole-living member of Veritas, admits that he has no intention of putting a definitive end to the Lex problem. Teague decides it's for the best of the world if he murders Clark in a Kryptonian/Bond-villain ritual, telling him that for every page of krpto-scripture professing Clark as a savior, there were three warning of Clark as a destroyer.

Lex arrives at the church, finds the clock, confronts Teague, cries about living in the shadows...and engages him in a sword fight. Ten yards away, Chloe -ex-machina appears to free Clark from his slow, torturous death. Clark shoots off, saves Teague, disarms Lex and destroys the clock. Which would be great, except Lex already acquired the clock's key, which enables him to later free the Traveler-controlling device.

In the final scenes, Chloe argues with Clark in his loft over whether he should kill Lex, while Lex is busy figuring out that the device is hidden in the Luthor mansion's fireplace.

His realization has something to do with a song he learned in his childhood, and the direction the Luthor mansion originally faced in Scotland.

It's pointless exposition that attempts to tie in the original claim that Lionel imported the castle from his family's home in Scotland to Smallville with the current plot, but it doesn't matter:

The scene is set for a confrontation where Clark is finally willing to put a stop to Lex, as long as it doesn't involve murdering him, and where Lex is willing to take control of Clark, regardless of who must die in the process.

Episodes like this make my head hurt. They give the impression that the writers pick and choose from the dozens of mysteries and mythologies introduced by the show and only revisit them when it's convenient without ever giving any of them solid closure.

Smallville began as a brilliant concept, especially for the teen-centric WB (now CW) network and was a lot of fun while it lasted. But it lacked direction.

Was the series intended as a prequel to the latest version of the Superman mythology? A retcon of the character? An Elseworlds and/or “Ultimate Superman” tale that introduced Kal-El to the planet Earth circa the late 1980s instead of the early 1920s?

With a season finale that should have been the series finale (no Lex, no Lionel Jonathan, no Martha, no Lana - ok, that's a good thing - no Chloe, no Al & Miles equal a disastrous year eight) coming next week it's transparent the show has outlived its' expiration date. Tell me I'm wrong.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Shut away in his loft, Clark is studying the latest of Kara's future-past Kryptonian messages. Krypton is on the verge on destruction and Brainiac is going to prevent Clark from ever being sent to earth.

Despite Chloe's protestations, Clark is willing to let this happen.

“All I've brought is death and suffering...meteor freaks, phantoms, Brainiac. I'm taking responsibility for all the lives I've ruined.”

“This planet would be better off if I never existed.”

At this point, it's obvious the episode is headed in one of two directions. Either Clark tries to change the future-past while fading from existence ala Back to the Future, or, his wish is granted, It's A Wonderful Life style.

As fun as the former scenario might have been, it's the latter that plays out, parlaying its slightly hokey premise into one of the most enjoyable episodes of the entire series.

Ignoring his wishes, Chloe forces the octagonal Kryptonian key into Clark's hands, triggering a blinding flash that knocks Clark back onto the floor of his barn, except...

It's no longer his barn. The loft is stacked with barrels of hay, and he's immediately confronted by none other than an alternate, earth-born Clark Kent.

After learning that both Jonathan and Martha are still alive, Clark asks Earth-Clark what's become of Lana Lang. He has no idea. How Earth-Clark never noticed the gorgeous, popular, next-door brunette is one of a million paradoxes not worth exploring.

Clark rushes off to find Chloe, hoping she can help locate their “mutual friend” Lana. Alas, Chloe knows Lana only as a cheerleader who ran in a different social circle. She'd love to help him, but she's got plans with her loving fiancee. Clark's happy for her. So am I.

His next stop is the Daily Planet, where he cons Jimmy into tracking down Lana for him. Turns out, she's a happily married family woman living in France. Given Clark's somewhat... limited perspective, he's apparently right on the money about the world being better off without him.

That is, until he bumps into Lois, who's almost immediately dragged away by a team of government agents led by Kara Kent, under the orders of President Lex Luthor. Awesome.

Sure, Lex as President makes no sense in this universe (no way he's 35 or older, among other glaring issues) but as a fan of assorted Batman (specifically the “No Man's Land” series) and Superman (specifically the “Red Son” series) comics, I loved seeing this concept played out on the show.

So. Lex as President plans to start a nuclear war, his intentions being to kill off all but the best and brightest so they can start a new and better world in the aftermath. With Brainiac as his chief advisor and Kara as his muscle, he's virtually unstoppable. But before he launches the attack, he needs to hold a press conference. Held at the Luthor Mansion.

Clark shows up, donning the awkward, bespectacled costume of Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter from the Daily Planet. He convinces Kara to turn on Lex; but it's too late – Lex was strapping a kryptonite clip and wastes no time taking them both down and triggering the inevitable nuclear apocalypse.

It's at this moment that Clark flashes back to the beginning of the episode – it was all a dream! – and realizes the error of his ways. He zips off to Krypton to confront Brainiac on the future-past version of Krypton.

With Kara's help, he manages to defeat Brainiac and ship baby Kal-El off to planet Earth. But all is not well.

Lana is still stuck in her Brainiac-induced coma, Lex is the only one offering to save her and Kara is apparently stricken with the same affliction as Lana.

The only upside? Lois offers to take Clark out and buy him a brew. After all he's just been through, Clark deserves at least that.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Chloe: “Have you ever killed anyone?”
Jimmy: “Yeah, but they were all bad.”

This week's episode of True Lies Smallville kicked off with a pre-credits intro that saw super-spy Jimmy Olsen break into a ventilation system, disable a courier, crack into a retinal-scan briefcase and steal its contents.

Flash back to fourteen hours earlier, where Jimmy's burning the toast on a breakfast he's prepared special for Chloe. She doesn't have time to eat, but makes an empty to promise to do lunch.

As it happens, she has enough time to meet with Clark, hoping he's managed to steal back the Veritas keys from Lex.

Nope. “I spent the night with Lana.”

Pointing out the obvious, Chloe argues there's no point in his saving Lana if Lex will eventually have complete control over his powers.

But if he's so bent on finding Brainiac, why doesn't he go re-read the Swann journals? You know, make himself useful for a change?

He does, and stumbles across a page he hasn't seen before, an entry dated 1989 telling him that if he wants to save Lana, he has to go to the fortress.

Unsure of the significance, Clark decides he better go ask Jor-El for the specifics.

Chloe, once again speaking as the voice of reason, points out that the last time Clark went to Jor-El for help, he turned him into a “popsicle...so you could outlive us all.”

Never mind that time that Clark sought Jor-El's help in saving Lana and it ended up costing Jonathan his life. Clark being Clark, he races off to the fortress anyway.

Just as he's on his way out of the barn, Jimmy confronts him, asking for his advice in dealing with a friend who's been keeping a really big secret. See, Jimmy's been approached by the government, who traced Chloe's hacking to his computer and recruited his help in uncovering the truth behind his terrorist girlfriend.

Relieved that Jimmy's not onto his own secret and oblivious to the implications of what he's saying, Clark assures him there's nothing to worry about, that he should just trust his heart and have faith in his friend.

While Clark's busy offering bad advice, Chloe's using the Isis Foundation computers to hack into government satellites to track Kara and Brainiac's disappearance into the sky. Right before she's able to reveal her shocking discoveries to Clark, she realizes that Jimmy's installed super-spy-ware on her computer.

In order to fully understand what it is she's found, Chloe needs to show up at The Ace of Clubs... club, for which she needs a date. Despite knowing of Jimmy's betrayal, she invites him as her date. Why not?
“With your busy schedule, I'm surprised you could pencil this in,” Jimmy snarks.
“And I'm surprised you were able to rent a tux on such short notice,” Chloe retorts, likely in an attempt to see which one of them could be more lacking in subtlety.

Following an awkwardly extended dance sequence, we finally flash back to the beginning of the episode.

Jimmy's government handler berates him for getting played by Chloe – the data he stole was nothing more than employee benefit packages – and proceeds to kidnap him before setting off to torture Chloe.

In no short order, Jimmy Bond disables his captor, rescues Chloe and re-ignites the dying embers of their relationship back at her apartment, assuring her that she has nothing more to worry about from the government. She has her secrets, he has his.

As with most secrets on the show, Jimmy's revolve around Lex Luthor, whom he begs for help in getting Chloe removed from the government's terrorist watch list. Lex has already taken care of this, and assures Jimmy that he's only doing this because, as his employee, Jimmy is his family, and families look out for each other. So should the opportunity ever arise where Jimmy could help Lex, Lex knows Jimmy will return the favor.

Of course, Lex, who used up the entire five minutes of his sub-plot tracking down a seemingly dead-end clue (some sort of astrological-crypto-puzzle) in Zurich, needs all the help he can get.

In the closing scene, Chloe reveals to Clark that she tracked down two blurs disappearing into a vortex in space around the same time Clark saw Kara and Brainiac fly off.

Her conclusion: Kara is contacting Clark from an alternate time-line on an alternate Krypton where Brainiac hopes to murder an infant Clark, effectively erasing his entire existence on earth.

It's time for Kal-El to go home. Here's hoping Brainiac's waiting, and prepared with a Kryptonian Sports Almanac.

“How does a son murder his own father?”
“Total absence of love. Some say that’s the very definition of evil.”

Satisfying as it may be to have the show finally acknowledge Lex’ conversion to the dark side, I think the phrase Chloe was looking for was “All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.” Considering what a backseat Clark’s taken to the wicked machinations of the Luthor family, it’s a much more suitable cliché.

That being said, if Al & Miles (while they’re still around) wanted to brand Lex as a wholly unredeemable villain, what better way to do it than having him murder his own father?

“I was raised in your shadow. Now you’re going to die in mine.”

Over at the Daily Planet, Clark & Chloe are hard at work tracking down Kara and Brainiac when they’re rudely interrupted by the rest of the staff exploding into action over the fact that someone’s leapt to their death out of the Luthor building, which, conveniently, is right across the street.

Before Clark gets a chance to stare down Lex with knowing eyes, the ghost of Lex’ conscience past, last seen in “Fracture,” appears in the ghostly form of a pre-adolescent, pre-meteor shower version of Lex.

“You killed him? You killed dad?”

The apparition shows up a few more times throughout the episode, trying to convince Lex he doesn’t have to be a bad person, but, gruesome as it was, seeing Lex toss him into the fire was something of a relief. It’s already been established that Lex is mad as a hatter and rotten to the core; a physical manifestation of his inner turmoil was wholly unnecessary.

Speaking of Lex, his personal assistant/right-hand woman Gina soon realizes he’s responsible for Lionel’s death, but promises to keep it to herself. I understand she’s got some weird thing for Lex, but considering his predilection for murdering those who stand in his way, couldn’t she have just kept that to herself?

Regardless, they head off to the Daily Planet in search of the second Veritas key. Lionel, predictably dropped it in Chloe’s desk. Confronted by Lex, she pretends she has no idea what he’s talking about, but once he opens her drawer and finds the key, she’s fired and swiftly escorted out of the building sans any of her personal belongings.

This conveniently allows Gina access to Chloe’s cell phone, and, in turn, the knowledge that Jimmy and Lois have discovered proof that Lionel was murdered. She tracks them down, shoots Lois and locks them both in a walk-in a freezer before heading off to the Isis foundation, where the only remaining copy of the photo implicating Lex in Lionel’s murder remains.

She also manages to overhear Clark and Chloe discussing his status as "The Traveler," which leads to her predictable death at the hands of an unknown assailiant. My best guess is that it was Jason Teague's father, but it seems that if anyone was going to have her killed, it would be Lex.

Clark, meanwhile, is scouring the Luthor mansion for the locket Lionel tried to pass off on him before dying. Instead, he finds a bizarre flashlight/projector covered in Kryptonian symbols warning him that if someone should come into possession of the box Lex is hours away from obtaining, they will have complete control over him.

After thawing out Jimmy and Lois, Clark heads off to Lionel’s grave site, where, conveniently, he and Lex are the only mourners. Sure, Lex made it a closed funeral, but wouldn’t there be a few intrepid paparazzi covering the burial?

Lex struts off, and Clark tosses the symbolic handful of dirt onto Lionel’s grave as the credits begin to roll.

Solid as this episode was, I hated to see Lionel go. Considering Michael Rosenbaum will only appear as a guest star next season, it’s going to be weird to see how Smallville operates without the Luthor family in a significant role. Then again, there’s always the chance that Lionel didn’t die, considering that Lex also killed off the younger version of himself, who was also a character since season one, and the fact that we never actually saw Lionel’s dead body.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Her memory restored, Kara is now content living the Green Acres life with Clark, casting aside the enormous assumed responsibilities that come with the ability to walk as a god among men, choosing instead to feed the horses and tend to the farm.

That is, until Brainiac shows up, promising to restore her life to the way it was before awakening on Earth. “Quiet morning. It's cold, still, bleak: almost reminds me of Krypton,” he tells her. Lacking Clark's pathos, she picks up on his obvious bad-guy vibe, and tosses him through the barn and into a water spigot.

Clark soon reveals to her the nature and motivation of the brain interactive construct, although neither can guess what its new goal may be, given that Clark has already destroyed Zod, and that Kara's father, even in his darkest hours, would never have sided with him.

Kara, proving twice in less than ten minutes that she is infinitely smarter than Clark, realizes that neither of them can defeat Brainiac on their own, and they need to level the playing field by having Clark learn to fly. I know there's a no flights/no tights rule in place for the show but...this is awesome.

At the Daily Planet, the wheels are being set in motion for the inevitable teaming up of Lois Lane and Jimmy Olsen. Desperate to preserve their jobs at the now Lex-run paper, they decide to investigate the murder of Patricia Swann. Because there's no better way to ingratiate oneself with their NEW boss than digging around one of said boss's arranged assassinations.

Speaking of Lex, he is finally piecing together the mysteries of the Veritas organization through conveniently timed flashbacks to his childhood. It turns out that two of the four members of the group, Queen and Swann, possessed keys to a safe-deposit box in Zurich. A box which contains the secret to controlling “The Traveler.” Well, another secret. Aside from kryptonite. And his compassion for humanity. And his doe-eyed, overly-trusting demeanor.

Hot on the case, Jimmy and Lois ambush Lionel, who pleads innocent to Patricia's death. Quick to believe he is just trying to talk his way out of the situation, evidence that her presumed killer was hired by Lex soon comes to light, but not soon enough for them to convince Clark, Chloe or Lana that Lionel, for once, is not just crying wolf.

Back on the farm, Kara's attempts to teach Clark the art of flight are, predictably, dismal. Bargaining his way out of the lesson, Clark says they're wasting time, and it would be faster if they split up and each went after Brainiac in their own way. I know there's a no flights/no tights rule in place for the show, but I don't see why this storyline would be set up for any other reason than crushing the fans who would really dig seeing Clark finally realize Superman's coolest ability.

Not that Gough & Millar are completely out of touch with those of us who've invested roughly 146 hours of their life watching their show, as a consolation prize for Clark's lack of flight is soon offered up in the form of Lana's apparent death.

Seeking revenge for Kara's defiance, Brainiac pulls a T-1000, turns his finger into a metallic shiv and re-arranges Lana's brain, effectively turning her into a walking zombie.


I know she won't be killed off, and her “dying” words of “Kal-El...Kal-El...you're too late” are more an obvious indication that Clark and or Kara will find a way to save her than anything else, the Moira Sullivan shot of her in the hospital was pure gold.

Kara doesn't realize that killing off Kristin Kreuk's character would be series suicide, and agrees to fly off into the great unknown with Brainiac under the assumption that doing so will save Lana.

Judging by Lionel's warnings, and the preview for next month's episode, though, saving Lana should be the least of Clark's concerns. If his desperate pleadings are to believed (and why shouldn't they? John Glover absolutely killed every scene in this episode) then something big is coming, something so significant that Lionel feels preventing it will redeem him of the innumerable sins he committed before serving as a vessel to Jor-El.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Working late into the night, Lionel Luthor is delivered an ominous note. “Heed our warning. The son of Krypton belongs to Veritas.”

Not one to take outside threats to the son of Krypton lightly, Lionel quickly dispatches a crack squad of mercenaries, armed with the latest in krypton-enhanced taser technology, to kidnap Clark. Operating under the auspice that all of this is in Clark’s best interest, Lionel has no trouble claiming the ends justify the means.

Lucky for Clark, Lana and Chloe were to quick to realize that Clark’s disappearance was wholly unrelated to his plans to head to the fortress and convince Jor-El to restore Kara’s memory/powers. Unlucky for them, their first instinct is to seek out Lionel for help, who tries to shift the blame toward Lex, pointing out that he’s been developing military-grade tasers. Yes.

Chloe and Lana aren’t the only young, attractive women on Lionel’s case. Patricia Swann, Virgil’s daughter, discovered that her father had been part of a secret society, Veritas, along with Lionel, the Queens and Genevieve Teague. The group was dedicated to finding and protecting the prophesized “traveler” who arrived in Smallville following a meteor shower.

A quick refresher – Virgil Swann was the scientist played by Christopher Reeve, the Queens are the parents of the Green Arrow and Genevieve Teague was the mother of Jason Teague, the assistant football coach who dated Lana.

Patricia discovered evidence that linked Lionel to the deaths of the other members of Veritas and realized that he wanted to keep the son of Krypton to himself. Threatening to expose him, she works out a deal to turn over the evidence in exchange for Clark. Shockingly, she’s murdered in cold blood by the episode’s end. For all her research into Lionel, she must never have realized the consequences of crossing the Luthor family.

Meanwhile, Chloe and Lana discover that Lionel is behind Clark’s disappearance and figure out he’s being held at an abandoned airstrip. Chloe notes the facility is locked down tighter than Fort Knox and quickly realizes that the only person who can save Clark is Kara, who’s something of a prisoner herself inside the Luthor mansion. Fortunately, Lana has blueprints of the secret escape tunnels Lex created in the case of another home invasion.

After freeing Kara, Chloe takes her to the fortress to demand that Jor-El restore her memories and power in order to save Clark. In what was probably one of Alison Mack’s best scenes of the whole series, she pleads “Out of all the planets across the universe you decided to send your only son to this one, to Earth! You trusted us to protect him! Now please, Jor-El, I need you to trust me. I love your son! He's in danger and he needs your help!”

Jor-El, who must have dug her bit of monologue as much as I did, obliges the request and returns Kara to her pre-amnesia state.

In short order, Kara arrives at the airstrip, where Lionel’s thug has taken matters into his own hands and decided that is Clark is too dangerous to be kept alive. She destroys the cage, by throwing it into the control room, which reveals to Clark that Lionel was behind his imprisonment.

Back at the farm, Patricia explains to Clark about Veritas, and Clark, who “always looks for the good in people” finally realizes that the Luthors are a lost cause. He confronts Lionel and asks the obvious question – why was the cage built in the first place (and wouldn't it have been easier to just bring Patricia out to the farm to meet Clark if he was going to have her killed anyway?) – and tells Lionel he’s the same terrible person he’s always been.

This was the episode I've been waiting for for a while. Kara finally served a purpose. The Veritas storyline was introduced. Chloe and Lana worked together to save Clark, and it didn't come off as trite. There was a small but significant reference to an older episode ("Lockdown") that made me think there is some continuity in this show after all. Can't wait to see next week's episode.

For more on Smallville, check out our Online Video Guide.

Smallville's return this week brought with it the return of Pete Ross and two classic show staples: over-the-top product placement and a one-on-one game of hoops featuring the egregious misuse of super-powers.

“Hero” opens with a concert held, naturally, in an abandoned Stride gum factory that's seen its overstock contaminated with liquid kryptonite. Jimmy's brought Kara along in an attempt to jog her memory, a date cut tragically short when she's nearly crushed by a hunk of falling debris.

Remy Zero never would have let this happen at one of their concerts.

Lucky for Kara, Pete “Plastic Man” Ross was on-hand to save her. Jimmy happens to catch a shot of the rescue on his cellphone, which is a bit of a...stretch.

Eager to show off his newfound abilities, Pete drops in on Clark, Lana and Lionel at the Kent farm. Even though he disappeared for years, his appearance is greeted with a surprising degree of non-chalance.

After laying down a heavy guilt-trip on Clark; “I had to leave everything behind because of you, but to be honest, it's better than living in your shadow,” Pete proves he can compete on Clark's level by Stretch-Armstronging his legs for an easy dunk.

Clark warns him that the meteor powers need to be reversed, that they'll bring nothing but trouble. Even though Pete's been witness to the inevitable self-destruction of countless meteor freaks, he fails to heed Clark's advice and storms off.

After a brief encounter with Chloe at the Daily Planet, Pete is more convinced than ever to reveal his powers to the world and decides to start his path toward becoming a hero by taking down Lex Luthor. With a computer virus.

Elsewhere, Kara is growing suspicious of Clark and Lana, rightly convinced they're hiding something from her. She confronts Lana with pictures of the kryptonian markings that have shown up everywhere from the Kent's barn to the small of Lana's back. It turns out, Lex told Kara these markings also appeared on her missing bracelet, an otherworldly trinket that now holds the key to her true identity. After Lana fails to convince her that Lex is a liar by...lying to her... Kara decides it's time to join Team Lex.

When Pete's caught red-handed sabotaging the Daily Planet's computers, Lex browbeats him into stealing Kara's bracelet from Lionel by threatening to reveal Chloe's secret to the world. Luckily, Jimmy happened to overhear the whole plan, and rushes off to warn to Clark and Chloe.

Clark again fails to convince Pete that he's making a huge mistake and ends up trapped in Lionel's office under a hunk of kryptonite while Pete rushes off to “save Clark” by “taking Lex out of the equation.”

Considering he survived a bullet to the head in the last episode, I doubt Lex has much to fear from Plastic Pete.

Inevitably, Pete winds up cuffed, beaten and powerless at the hands of Lex and his hired goon, who was either Smallville's equivalent of the Haitian from Heroes, or a henchman who realized the quickest way to strip Pete of his powers was knocking the gum out of his mouth.

Lucky for Pete, the always-reliable Clark shows up in the nick of time and saves the day. Pete once again renounces his long-harbored jealousy of Clark, and vows to find the true hero inside of himself. Haven't they been over this before?

The episode closes with Lex nearly uncovering the secret of the constellation arrangement found in his family crest, but is interrupted by Kara, who's decided she's better off with Lex than Clark.

Here's hoping that arc doesn't drag on for as long as it did when Lana made that exact same decision a few seasons back.

Overall, I was hoping for more, not just because it was the first new episode in a month, but because I was looking forward to seeing Pete back on the show. He left just when the dynamic between him and Clark started to get interesting, and his reappearance felt almost insignificant.

Plus, when the highlight of the episode, for me at least, was a product-placement inspired Chloe quip - along the lines of: "Maybe next time Stride won't let the flavor last so long" - it's obvious there was something lacking.

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Considering last week's episode went up against the recap of Lost, that opening scene with Black Canary almost knifing Chloe should have ended with Clark saving her from near death, not Green Arrow's arrow shattering mid-air because Black Canary has the power of sound.

That aside, it was hard to find anything redeeming in tonight's airing. Tom Welling's take on Bizarro was a lot stronger than his take on Clark's been in a while, and the relationship between Lana and the “real” him were beyond uncomfortable. Even the scenes with Lionel and Lex, who for a long time were far and away the strongest characters on the show, felt forced.

So what worked? Not a lot. Why would Green Arrow reveal his identity to Chloe, who was nothing more than a bit player in the Justice League, and not Lois, the gorgeous girl he was dating?

Why did it take this long for Lana to see herself more as a Lady Macbeth than the girl next door? On the same line, why did it take this long for Clark to realize that she's nothing but bad news? “Every time you look at me, it's like you wish I was someone else.” You're darned right about that, Clark.

As a long-time fan of the show, it borders on painful to see it going in this direction. Odd as it may seem, the Green Arrow character was the one to point it out — Clark is acting selfish, laying around on the couch while the world around him falls apart.

In tune with the comics, the first few seasons portrayed him as a selfless, sacrificial hero. Clark's unwavering sense of right and wrong was defined by his incredible parents, not Lionel Luthor and Lana Lang.

So what else happened this week? Clark fell further out of touch with his moral center and Lois, who hasn't been on the show for months, had her heart broken by the clone/former Editor in Chief of the Daily Planet for no good reason. And Chloe, who got dumped by Jimmy Olsen for Supergirl and used to be in love with Clark, fell for the Green Arrow, who used to date Lois.

If older fans of the show who've lost touch with current episodes don't think that makes any sense — don't worry. You're about as confused as current fans are.

I don't want to come off in the wrong way. Smallville is a great show with a great premise. It's just one that's lost touch with its' original premise and its' original fans. I'm excited every time it comes on: but I can't wait until it gets back to being a show that's fun to watch week in and out.

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With a forced hiatus of nearly a month and a half, "Persona" had a lot more riding on it than was likely intended. Why else would it have opened it with an awkward morning-after scene between Lana and Bizarro?

How many times does the audience need to get beat with the fact that Lana will never fall for the real Clark? She married Lex Luthor — of course she's going to dig Bizarro Clark over regular Clark. Not than I can blame her — Bizarro Clark can fly her to Paris for breakfast, long as he doesn't you know, hit any direct sunlight on the way there.

Lana, as usual, is either blind to or complicit with the sketchy things going on around her and goes as far to fight with Chloe when she points out how strange Clark has been acting. I've said it before — if the writers are turning her character into a villain, they're doing a great job. But if she's supposed to be a sympathetic love-interest? Then I'm completely lost.

But back to the clones. The Julian Luthor model was busy ingratiating himself to Lionel, who was more than grateful to accept one of Lex' insane experiments as his own flesh and blood. Was Lionel going to use him to repeat an earlier storyline and bilk Lex out of the inheritance? Maybe treat him as he does Clark and act like Julian is the son he always wanted?

Fortunately, Lex wants to see the resolution to these story lines about as much as the average viewer, tired with the Julian sub-plot, does. So he hires a mugger to kill him off. On a show as open-ended as Smallville, some closure can be nice.

The Brain Interactive Construct on the other hand, despite being targeted by both Clark and Bizarro, isn't as easy a target. Seeing that he's the best non-Lex villain the show has ever seen, this is a welcome development. Matter of fact, the reveal that he'd played Clark and Bizarro against each other just so he could find the Kryptonian scientist who created him was nothing short of awesome.

Main plot-points aside, I'm surprised the powers that be chose this particular episode to square off against the juggernaut that was the two-hour premiere of Lost. Sure, seeing Brainiac again was cool, but other than that....I just felt sorry for Bizarro. He's just a "failed experiment" who was jealous of Clark's life and tried to take advantage of his position by dating Lana.

Is that really so bad? All Clark has done over the past few seasons is resent his powers and destroy his relationships. Why not let Bizarro have a shot? It's not as if Clark was using them for anything beyond saving the citizens of Smallville from car crashes and meteor-rock villains, right?

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Serving as an intermediary between a straight run of new episodes – the last was more than a month ago and the next won't likely appear until late January - “Gemini” had a lot riding on it.

Would it thread together the innumerable plots running throughout this season? Would it provide enough to sate the fans' patience while holding back enough that it's anyone's guess where things are headed? Would it serve as a solid, stand-alone episode that could be enjoyed by the most casual of fans? Would it provide a satisfactory answer to the odd flash of white that ended “Blue”?

I could go on ad-infinitum about the questions and expectations raised for what might have been a simple, holiday-themed episode, ala “Lexmas,” but it doesn't matter. The obvious, overwhelming answer is a solid yes.

As obvious as some of the reveals should have been, such as Grant being a Project Gemini clone and Clark acting bizarrely against character, the way both played out was at the same time satisfying and faithful to the series' continuity.

On the flip side, the side plots that helped carry this episode to its awesome, if somewhat bizarre reveal ending were ten times more enjoyable on screen than they seemed print. I mean, Chloe and Jimmy were trapped in an elevator. With a bomb.

This is the kind of plot device that usually drives me up the walls, but there's no way to not give it a pass: Chloe finally had something good happen to her, we got to (sort of) find out what her meteor power she has and there was a straight-up awesome scene of Clark/Bizarro racing to save her.

The only downside, really, was that after his quick trip up the stairs, I started getting excited that the white flash meant that Jor-El finally put Clark through the training he needed, and he'd learned how to harness the power of flight. Oh well, the awesome Bizarro reveal at the end more than makes up for it.

Speaking of reveals, I love that I didn't realize until now that Grant/Julian was a clone. The fact that he now knows that too makes his character much more interesting – to the point that when he broke up with Lois, something I've been wanting to happen for a while, I actually felt bad for the both of them.

In truth, I'm starting to feel bad for Lex, too. Grant's accusation – that Lex was so desperate to mean something to someone that he was willing to take the risks of creating a clone – was spot on. Given everything that Lex has done, this rates pretty low on the list of evil. As misguided as his intentions were, he wasn't setting out to do something wrong.

I'm not sure if it's that the writers wanted to make him a sympathetic character or if it's because Michael Rosenbaum is such a solid actor that this incarnation of Lex Luthor has come off this way; although, it is telling that the two characters most obsessed with his downfall are Bizarro Clark and crazy Lana.

Who's really the villain here?

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Jor-El really knows how to rub it in.

After wasting more than 75 percent of the episode on storylines wholly reliant on the further dumbing down of Smallville's most aloof characters (Lois & Clark, natch), Clark's biological dad had to go and remind everyone that his son lacks the capacity to learn a lesson, warning that there will be "consequences for [his] defiance!"

I'm no soothsayer, but here goes a few predictions for these "consequences":

• A lack of new episodes till Dec. 13
• Forcing a gimmicky, holiday theme on the first new episode
• Having said episode feature a Jimmy & Chloe storyline

Which means, after four weeks of reruns, all the fans have to look forward to is the sadistic spawn of "Lexmas" and "Noir" — easily the worst two episodes of the entire series.

This isn't to say "Blue" totally, well, you know....

In a weird way, I enjoyed the Grant Gabriel = Julian Luthor twist. In the context and continuity of the show, it makes absolutely no sense, but I've been waiting for an interesting Lex subplot ever since his obsession with finding Kara disappeared after the first few episodes. Besides, it was obvious Grant/Julian was in the Luthor corner from the get-go, so what better way to explain it than have him be an actual Luthor?

Beyond that, the only other interesting development was Kara losing her memory and ending up in Detroit, which has something to do with Clark smashing that crystal. How? Why? Forget it reader, this is Smallville.

In spite of the odd choice to grant amnesia to the only character whose knowledge of Clark's true identity, in the long run, wouldn't put anyone in danger, it might be fun to see Kara realize her powers accidentally, and develop more into a believable, well-thought-out character. Instead of one who disappears for a week to go "shred waves" with Jimmy Olsen.

This show is set in Kansas! Having characters disappear for a week because they love surfing is lazier than having Kara develop amnesia!

Speaking of lazy writing, how is it that a clone of Clark's real mother was able to sense the darkness within Lana while Clark, in the face of everything, refuses to even acknowledge the horrible things he's known her to do? I get that Superman is the forgiving, have-faith-in-everyone type, but he's already turned against Lex, so I don't see why we're still being strung along with the "Clark is clueless, Lana is a monster" storyline.

Is she going to change? Is she going to betray him? Is she going to get back with Lex? At this point it doesn't matter anymore. Her character is nothing but a drag on an already bogged-down show.

I know it probably won't be addressed in the upcoming Christmas episode, but I hope that flash to white in the fortress at the end of tonight's episode actually signified something, anything, that will drive forward what is supposed to be the underlying plot of Smallville — Clark's path to destiny.

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Lana must have been brushing up on her Season 1 DVDs. How else to explain her immediate understanding that the confluence of Clark, kryptonite and a bolt of lightning would grant her Clark's powers?

At least tonight, unlike in "Leech," her gain was not Clark's loss. Were this the case, we wouldn't have been treated to one of the most hilarious "sex scenes" to ever air on broadcast TV.

I know they're both superpowered and it's been almost four seasons since they've known each other intimately, but triggering an earthquake at the Talon? Talk about being more powerful than a locomotive.

Of course, Chloe wastes no time in pointing out that the dangers of Lana acquiring Clark's powers far outweigh any "extracurricular" benefits the situation could yield.

Lana doesn't hesitate to prove Chloe right; boasting that with Clark's abilities, she can now break into any locked door, slip into any room unnoticed, eavesdrop on any conversation. I wonder what she has in mind....

Clark, who apparently forgot he was able to reverse the effects of this transfer the last time it happened without even having his powers, decided Lionel was the only person who could help strip Lana of her newfound abilities.

Lionel can do no such thing, but uses the opportunity to warn Clark that Lana "is not... may not be the person you think she is," explaining that she was the one responsible for his captivity after the dam broke.

Elsewhere, Lana makes good on her promise to use her abilities for the noble purpose of breaking & entering and tears open Lex's safe, hand-delivering its contents to the "Daily Planet." After it's rightly pointed out that the "Planet" can hardly use stolen property to publish an exposé on the Luthors (even though its obvious the real reason is that the editor is in bed with them), Lana drop-kicks Lois through a window (I guess she hated Lois' new hair as much as I did) and vows to go after Lex herself.

She finds Lex in his lab, tinkering with what's obviously Brainiac in liquid form and nearly kills him, but not before Lex steals a kiss and reminds her that she has more in common with him than she ever will with Clark. Who, speaking of, is watching most of this go down on Lana's spy-computers. He rushes to the lab, saves Lex and reverses the lightning/kryptonite transfer.

After asking Lex whether he'll press charges against Lana, Lex points out that he got what he wanted — proof that Lana cares more about him than she does Clark. Which means I got what I wanted — Clark finally waking up to what Lana has become.

He confronts her in the barn, and she cops to kidnapping Lionel, with the caveat that she only did it to protect Clark. "I'm not going to apologize for going to extremes to protect the people I love!" she protests. Clark, as always, states the obvious: "You sound like Lex."

I was really hoping for a blowout here, especially after Clark realized that Lana was acting crazy well before she gained any powers, but she talks her way out of a serious confrontation by making Clark promise he'll always love her, no matter what.

As "I'll Put a Spell on You" plays in the background, I wonder if the writers are trying to foreshadow anything here?

Speaking of the writers — as it was reported on our Strike Watch blog earlier this week, there are scripts for eight more episodes in the can and the final one ends with a cliff-hanger. So even if the strike isn't resolved in time, the season won't just grind to an awkward halt. Well, no worse than usual, anyway.

To see more about Smallville, including videos and potential spoilers, visit our Online Video Guide.

A few weeks ago, I griped that the "Kara" episode reminded me too much of Season 1 and was worried the overarching plot this year would amount to nothing more than Kara getting acclimated to her powers and life on Earth. At times like this, I don't mind being wrong.

While Kara's fevered search for her crystal was a bit derivative of Clark's obsession with finding the crystals in Season 4, it did a great job of tying together a number of storylines, a feat the show hasn't pulled off so well since, uh... Season 4.

In one fell swoop, Kara's search stabilized her rocky relationship with Clark, fleshed out the government's involvement by introducing Operation Starhawk, brought Lionel back into the fold as a father figure to Clark, and utilized one of the most bizarrely satisfying methods to justify a flashback I've ever seen.

We've had glimpses of Starhawk and its perpetrators, dubiously dubbed the Department of Domestic Security, in past episodes, but it's nice to learn a bit more about its purpose — to analyze and deal with threats from "the heavens." I love Lionel's way with words, even if most of his speeches seem borrowed from Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power.

As for Lionel, I can't say it any better than Lex did: "You spend as much time protecting Clark as you do pushing me away.... Whose father are you?"
Burn!
"I wish," Lionel responded, "I could say yours, and be proud of you, but your treatment of Lana..."

Lex went on all indignant; I learned it from you, Dad, that was my brain on Luthor, etc., but I'm not that person anymore. Of course not. Lionel doesn't buy it either, and I was oddly reminded of the way Lionel was transformed after he switched bodies with Clark, only to return to his nefarious ways after a chiding from Lex. It's not just that they enable the worst part of each other's personalities, they encourage it.

Kara's flashbacks, induced by a steady drip of krypto-liquid and a machine developed by Summerholt (nice) revealed she's been to earth before, which might sort of explain how she learned to fly, hack into government computers, seduce men for information, and get a cell phone in such a short period of time.

Also, her dad really was the monster Martian Manhunter made him out to be, and she's the one who came up with the name Kal-El. After last week's episode, I told myself I wouldn't gripe too much about the show's interpretation of the mythology, but that last part was a completely arbitrary deviation.

Speaking of the mythology, Lana was supposed to end up married to Pete. Remember him? Clark's best friend who was awkwardly written out of the show in Season 3? Now they've got her divorced from Lex and running some bizarre clinic designed to "help" the meteor freaks from Lex' 33.1 program. I'm glad they brought 33.1 back, but did it have to involve Lana?

Besides, does she honestly think Chloe is going to keep it a secret from Clark? Keeping Clark in the dark never works out on this show. And poor Chloe. Burdened with everyone's secrets, she's now repeatedly scorned by Jimmy, of all people (does he own any shirts that he didn't pick up at the bowling alley?).

The writers seem to use every bit of Chloe's screen time as an excuse to belittle, embarrass or humiliate her. If she's not being set up as an eventual villain, this is just pure sadism.

At least they were kind enough to reveal two crucial bits of information in the closing minutes of the show: First, Clark snagged Kara's crystal (probably right before he met up with her at the bar). Second: Clark's the only character gullible enough to still trust Lana.

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"Who could resist the story of a small-town boy who grew up to save the world from the evil Devilicus?"

Hardcore fans of the original comic book dissatisfied with changes in mythology, that's who.

The opening shot of "Action" clues the audience in on the episode's running gag: The town of Smallville will serve as a set-within-a-set for "Warrior Angel," a film based upon the fictional version of the Superman of the Smallville universe. I have a feeling this is an episode the writers have been wanting to make for a long, long time.

As Clark happens to be on hand for the shooting of "Warrior Angel," something goes horribly wrong. The lead actress' car's brakes give out and it strikes a fence, flipping over and sending her to an inevitable, fiery death — until Clark races in, grabs her and wins her undying affection. What is it with Clark and saving people from car accidents?

But this was no accident! Someone tampered with her car, an attempt to force the filmmakers to adhere to "Warrior Angel" canon — this character was supposed to die at the hands of the hero's arch-nemesis, Devilicus, an act that forced him to accept his destiny to save mankind. Could this be an excuse for the writers to kill Lana off once and for all? The last time she "died," Clark was about to do just that....

Nah. It was just an excuse for the writers to poke fun at Smallville's rabid fans. "These blogs," Clark noted after discovering the possible identity of the attempted murderer, "these message boards and fan forums, they're all pretty extreme." Ouch.

The bar for self-referential episodes of a popular TV show was set pretty high with Monk's "Mr. Monk and the TV Star," where the writers teased everything from the fan uprising against a new theme song to the unrealistic way the show portrayed police work.

"Action" stuck more to mocking the nit-picking, obsessive nature of a fan base bent on preserving a mythology already distorted a million times over, which provided more than enough material.

Both worked great, but the deciding factor? In Smallville the obsessed fan turned out to be the killer. In Monk the obsessed fan was played by Sarah Silverman. As much as I loved this episode and as much as I love Smallville as a whole, you just can't trump a guest appearance by Sarah Silverman.

Meanwhile, we finally learn where Lionel's been — trapped inside a Stephen King novel. I just don't understand why Marilyn didn't hobble Lionel after his first escape attempt.

I have no idea why Lana was behind this bizarre subplot; something to do with all the land that was bought up?

Color me extreme, but I was kind of hoping we'd never find out. I know having the production assistant murder Lana was too heavily foreshadowed for it to actually happen but for a minute there, after she was thrown off the building... well. I was kind of hoping the next shot would be Clark peering over the ledge, a horrified expression on his face the only sign that this time he'd been too late. Instead, he (apparently) learned how to use his power of flight to save her. I can live with that. For now.

As much as the episode gently mocked the show's more, ah, dedicated fans, it also paid more tribute to the mythology of Superman than it has in a long while. Lana (!) said it best, when telling Clark that he might be better off without her.

"He just needed hope. Millions of people look up to Warrior Angel, maybe they could look up to you instead.... One day, the world will need you more than I do, and I don't want to be the one holding you [back]."

Clark naturally chose Lana and the farm over his true destiny, a decision illustrated beautifully by the poignant closing shot: Clark hanging the cape over a fence post, walking away toward the farmhouse as the camera pulls out to show the cape, his future, billowing precariously in the wind.

PS. Was I the only one who thought it funny that the network chose this episode to launch an ad campaign for the "Smallville Blogger Competition"?


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