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« Today's News: Our Take
Britney Bits: The Movie's Off, Obituary Is On
Britney Spears by Mark Sullivan/ WireImage.com
This past 24 hours, in Britneyland....
• Spears has lost a potential role in the film Memoirs of a Medicated Child. As a studio rep tells TV's Extra, "Even with an accepted $3 million offer on the table and negotiations being finalized, producers decided to can Brit." Spears is being replaced by Peter Falk's niece, Samantha.
• Reflecting on his intrusion in the Spears spectacle earlier this month, Dr. Phil asks himself on his Monday talker, "Was it helpful to the situation? Regrettably no. [If] I had to do it over again, I probably wouldn't make any statement at all. Period." (USA Today)
• As they are well-known to do, lest they find themselves having to research and write 18 grafs at 2 am on a Saturday, the Associated Press has started work on Spears' o-Brit-uary. "I think one would agree that Britney seems at risk right now," an AP editor tells Us. "[If] something were to happen, we would have to be prepared."
Related:
• Britney's Pregnancy Rumor All a Gag
• Is Britney Planning a Green (Card) Wedding?
• Britney Spears Still Barred from Visitation
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Jan 18, 2008 3:17 PM
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"Memoirs of a Medicated Child" (fix the initial caps, Matt!) - is that Britney's autobiography?
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Jan 18, 2008 3:28 PM
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"The Obituary's On!"
Classy.
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Jan 18, 2008 3:35 PM
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Stay classy, San Diego!
Yeah, I'm feeling a bit loopy. - MWM
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Jan 18, 2008 3:37 PM
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"Stay classy, San Diego!"
OK, I had to Google that -- I haven't seen that movie!
I thought the headline was just fine -- it was as classy as this absurd (albeit tragic) situation deserves.
And, Matt -- congrats on feeling loopy! But next time, bring enough for the whole class! 
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Jan 18, 2008 3:52 PM
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I love lamp!!!
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Jan 18, 2008 4:06 PM
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As they are well-known to do, lest they find themselves having to research and write 18 grafs at 2 am on a Saturday...
What's a graf?
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Jan 18, 2008 4:07 PM
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A graf is a paragraph in newsroomspeak.
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Jan 18, 2008 4:12 PM
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Chirping about her obit already being written? Really, TVGuide. I thought you would have a little more taste than that.
Although I have delighted in mocking Britney for many years, this is too much. She clearly has very real mental health issues, and it disgusts me that so many seem eager to see another Anna Nicole situation on hand. Whatever sells ad space, I guess!
I hope she gets the help she needs before it is too late.
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Jan 18, 2008 4:33 PM
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What? No mention of Brit's multiple personality problems that have been reported elsewhere?
You know perhaps TV Guide should create a separate section for just Britney news, like you did with the strike news. I think you have more news on Britney then you do on the strike so it would only make sense.
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Jan 18, 2008 4:46 PM
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And, Matt -- congrats on feeling loopy! But next time, bring enough for the whole class! 
Or, with another salute to the movies-
I'll have what he(she's) having!!!
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Jan 18, 2008 4:54 PM
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No surprise here.
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Jan 18, 2008 5:43 PM
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Hmm, maybe you should stop getting news feeds from TMZ and Us Magazine.
You know perhaps TV Guide should create a separate section for just Britney news, like you did with the strike news.
I second that. Maybe you should hire a pap to just follow her around and have a live streaming video site so we can have full coverage with up-to-the-minute info on what she's doing. But seriously. O-Brit-uary? So wrong. I laughed. But so wrong.
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Jan 18, 2008 7:16 PM
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Didn't somebody around her age from Hollywood just die?
This is so sickening what is happening to her. Everybody says that her family needs to step in and help her. She is far gone from reality to realize what is happening in front of her. And the new bf is enabling her much farther.
There is this amazing Jay-Z song from his Kingdom Come album called "Hollywood" (featuring the one and only Beyonce), and in it there is this amazing verse:
"Wanna be seen
Male groupies
What you once despised
James Dean
John Belushi
Blow your whole life
Tryna live in the lights
Heroins followin Marilyn
Hoppin' over the edge
Just like Janice Joplin
River Phoenix
Jimi Hendrix
All of them ended by
Hollywood"
And if she don't get the help that she really deserves, sadly she'll just be another Hollywood statistic.
Here's a link to the song (nevermind the fan video).
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Jan 18, 2008 8:10 PM
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I am highly suspicious of this Us story regarding the AP preparing an obrituary. They should have written it long ago. They should have one for Justin Timberlake, too, even though he's squeaky clean. Unless AP has fallen down on the job in recent years, it's a regular thing to write obituaries for any public figure as soon as they become notable.
No one expected Princess Di to, um, die; but they had to have an obit ready. No matter who may die tonight, if they're in the public eye, an obit will be on the wire services within minutes. Don't hand me this gar-bahj about Brit's obit just being written now!
This story is the sort of prefab pap they used to print in Tiger Beat magazine to a naive readership!
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Jan 18, 2008 9:43 PM
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