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« Ausiello Report
Live CBS Upfront Coverage
3:46: CBS' Upfront starts in 15 minutes and I'm lost. Does anyone out there know how to get to Carnegie Hall!? Ba-dum-bum.
3:48: I've got an awesome seat right in the center. Some might say I have a birds-eye view of the stage. Ba-dum-bum.
3:53: CBS is young and hip — and they've got a DJ spinning records in front of the stage to prove it!
3:57: You haven't lived until you've heard CBS' NFL theme song remixed with "We Will Rock You."
4:00: Showtime! Oooh, we're starting with a musical number! A reggae group is welcoming us with a song about the upfronts.
4:05: Ladies and gentleman, make way for King Les Moonves!!
4:10: "For the fifth year in a row, CBS is America's most watched network," Les proclaims. So humble, that one.
4:15: Moonves introduces a YouTube clip that a fan compiled featuring David Caruso's endless one-liners from CSI: Miami. Funny stuff.
4:16: Someone in row 12 smuggled a freakin' laptop in here! No fair! She should be forced to Blackberry-blog like me! (It's not easy.)
4:19: Obligatory highlight reel from the 2006-07 season. This is my favorite part. Really.
4:21: Nina Tassler takes the stage to introduce the network's "daring" new fall lineup. She's referring to that vampire detective, I think.
4:26: Starting with Monday night, Nina describes How I Met Your Mother as the show that "gets the assistants buzzing in the halls." Read between the lines, people.
4:35: New Monday sitcom Big Bang Theory is being billed by CBS as the season's "smartest new comedy." If you're an idiot. Seriously, this show looks heinous.
4:36: Onto Tuesday, NCIS is TV's "quietest" hit. That's funny. And I think you know why.
4:37: Jimmy Smits' Sopranos-esque family drama Cane looks so-so. Smits comes out onstage and describes himself as a "50-year-old upfront virgin." All those years on NYPD Blue and L.A. Law and he never attended an upfront? Hmmm....
4:45: The new Wednesday reality show Kid Nation is like Deadwood-meets-Romper Room. Fun concept. But if I wanted to listen to a bunch of kids screaming and yelling I'd fly coach.
4:48: On to Thursday: Nina props up Survivor by tearing down time-slot rival Ugly Betty, claiming it's down 40 percent since its premiere. Hey, don't you go messin' with my Betty!
4:50: Close to Home's Friday night replacement Moonlight has bite. Ba-dum-bum. Nina refers to the show's star, Alex O'Loughlin, as "scary handsome." Get a room.
5:00: Viva Laughlin — it's Las Vegas-meets-Cop Rock! Exec producer Hugh Jackman is beamed in via satellite from Sydney, where he's shooting the new Baz Luhrmann film, Australia, with Nicole Kidman. Wow, that had to cost some serious moolah.
5:07: Mid-season soap Swingtown? Count. Me. In.
5:15: OMG, it's over! Wow, shortest upfront ever.
5:20: Headed to Tavern on the Green for the afterparty. Got questions for David Caruso? Now's your chance!!!
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May 16, 2007 3:55 PM
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Can sum1 please ask CBS why they don't stick How I Met Your Mother inbetween Two & A Half Men and CSI Miami. Everything in that slot gets good ratings.
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May 16, 2007 3:59 PM
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What I'd like to know is why Christine gets a short order when it won JLD an Emmy, and the ratings are decent. There must be a rationale, but I don't get it.
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May 16, 2007 4:13 PM
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Is the order for New Christine shorter?
I know its midseason but where does it say that?
Hey a full season of HIMYM..I am not complaining..
I hope they put New Christine and HIMYM after the superbowl this year to make up for last year's debacle...
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May 16, 2007 4:19 PM
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Please ask why the hell they are cancelling The Class. It makes no sense. Or else it doesn't make any "cents".
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May 16, 2007 4:20 PM
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Can you ask Les why David Caruso who has turned into this cartoon-like figure ever be taken seriously with the ridiculous antics he displays on that silly show he is in?
AND BRING BACK JERICHO!
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May 16, 2007 4:23 PM
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Yes please ask them why they decided to drop Jericho when it was getting so good.....and lets not even talk about all the cliffhanging things they left us with??!!??
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May 16, 2007 4:29 PM
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Any idea if Nestor Carbonell (Richard Alpert) will still be on Lost part time next season since Cane got picked up?
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May 16, 2007 4:29 PM
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I love Nestor Carbonell on Lost..didn't know he was on a pilot..
possible spoiler for Lost?
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May 16, 2007 4:31 PM
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OMG that video is hilarious, but the "YAHHHHHHHHH" after each one was starting to make me crazy!
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May 16, 2007 4:39 PM
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Nina describes How I Met Your Mother as the show that "gets the assistants buzzing in the halls." Read between the lines, people.
Huh?
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May 16, 2007 4:39 PM
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The only thing I cared about on CBS was Jericho. Sure hope the reports are wrong and that they bring this show back. I have resigned myself to The Class not returning because CBS is known to not give quality shows a chance to find an audience but will keep tired reality shows on forever!
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May 16, 2007 4:40 PM
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yeah mmph, I could only watch 2 minutes of it..those yahhhhh's were too much.
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May 16, 2007 4:40 PM
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The Super Bowl rotates yearly between the networks that carry NFL games, so it won't be on CBS again next year.
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May 16, 2007 4:42 PM
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