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Episode Recap: "The Gang Gets Whacked"

This big sprawling epic of an episode taught us that get-rich-quick schemes always come with awful consequences. And it's really OK if that consequence only affects a homeless defrocked priest whose life you've ruined once before. So if you think you've found an easy but illegal way to make money, make sure you've got your favorite easily addicted and sexually tempted priest friend nearby.

The gang starts off with the best of intentions (isn't that always the way?): In order to pay for the electricity to be fixed in their bar, they decide to use the money they get from selling the drugs they found in the speakers they stole. It's an age-old story. The problem is that the drugs belong to the mob, and they know who took it. An additional problem is that the gang has no idea how much drugs are worth, so they sell $25,000 worth for $300, and they need to pay the mob back by the end of the week.

Since Frank refuses to use his finances to bail them out of yet another tough spot, they have to figure out how to earn the money on their own. Since hard work is out of the question, they decide to solve their problem with a combination of drug dealing and prostitution. What better place to do this than at the Frank's country club? Though he won't give them money, he will help them earn it on their own (teach a man to fish...), so he agrees to take them there.

The gang splits up (they can do more damage that way) in their attempts to earn money: Mac and Dee pose as successful businesspeople (who also sell OxyContin on the side); Frank continues to convince Dennis that prostitution is the way to go; and Charlie befriends jockeys and discovers a love of horses (possibly due to his hunch that he was a mythical centaur in a former life).

Somehow Charlie is the most successful in raising money, and even befriends the jockeys after discovering they can talk. Apparently he thought they only existed in statue form on lawns. This might be why he believes he could have been a centaur. If one mythical creature exists, why not another? In the end, Mac and Dee get thrown out due to their unsubtle drug-selling methods, and they all have to leave, but without Mac. He is left behind due to his bossiness. When Mac starts yelling after them in a very Fredo-esque way "I'm smart! I deserve respect!" I should have known that his next move would be to try to join the mob.

The gang buys more coke in an effort to continue to increase their supply, and I believe my favorite moment of the episode was Charlie trying to weigh it using a bathroom scale, leading Charlie to yell, "The coke won't register on the scale! I think it's weightless!" Charlie and Dee decide to sell it to businessmen on the street, and while there, they run into Rickety Cricket. You may remember him from a previous episode in which he left the priesthood for Dee and the gang ruined his life. Well, his life is still ruined, but that doesn't stop them from using him to sell it to drug addicts on the street. In fact, they don't even remember that they ruined his life before. Eventually they all get addicted to coke and the money made gets wasted on a drug-induced trash can purchase by Cricket.

Meanwhile Frank is now forcing Dennis to be a male prostitute. He even has to resort to smacking him. In addition to this indignity, Dennis has to continue sleeping with a parade of unattractive women. Worst of all, he has to do it to Stacy Q's "Two of Hearts." Why does Dennis always get the cheesy '80s music played during his scenes? Is it because he was on the short-lived That '80s Show?

Mac has trouble getting the mob to accept him. He tries his hardest by doing all the menial tasks they ask of him, yet no luck. This seems to be a recurring theme in Mac's life: No matter how hard he tries, he can't get "liked" by the people he wants.

They're nearly unsuccessful raising the $25,000: Charlie and Dee end up doing more coke than they actually have (in the end it's flour, actually); Mac gets fed up with the dirty jobs he's doing and takes his anger out by convincing Dennis to give up prostitution and rejecting the mob boss' wife's sexual advances by calling her "gross"; but Dennis saves the day by raising all the money through getting even (Of course, Dennis got even. That's what he does best) with pimp Frank by selling his solid-gold drinking chalice.

In the end, it's God that saves him. Well, a priest really. Actually, a former priest whom they get hooked on cocaine to the point where he is writing a (trash can) drum-based musical involving a crime-fighting archangel. Cricket gets falsely accused and ratted out by the gang, leading him to be punished for their sins. The kind of story I wouldn't have believed had I not seen it with my own eyes. This may have been the most touching episode of Sunny yet. Hope you all enjoyed it.

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