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« Nip/Tuck
December 5, 2006: Willy Ward
Weeks ago, when Escobar said goodbye to Sean and told him, "We're even now," and that he wouldn't be back, you knew that was too good to be true. Tonight, after James shot herself to death, you knew that would not be the end of Michelle's troubles. But who knew James would be working for Escobar? Nice twist. Now Escobar wants Michelle to take over for James. That's not going to fit into Christian and Michelle's perfect new family life with little Wilber. We all knew as soon as Michelle got into her car that someone was going to be inside — but did any of you expect it to be Escobar? Yes, Robert LaSardo's name was in the opening credits, but I thought he'd be seen in one of Sean's dream sequences. We'll have to wait until next week's season finale to find out more about Escobar's diabolical plans, but let's cross our fingers that those plans don't involve one of Wilber's kidneys. How about James gifting Wilber tonight with an Operation game board and pointing out the tiny little kidney game piece? Yikes!
Poor Sean. Last week he was a drunk; tonight he was once again experiencing the "Jan Brady Syndrome" — always feeling like he's in Marcia's, I mean, Christian's shadow. First that sexy patient Ms. Hudson (Robyn Lively) wanted Christian to perform her boob job. I mean, come on, Christian is No. 7 in "Ocean Drive" magazine's 10 Most Eligible Bachelors. Then Matt came to Christian for sexual advice on how to pleasure Kimber more effectively. Asking Sean would be like getting tips from Dr. Ruth, thought Matt. I kept waiting for Sean to scream: "All I hear is Christian this and Christian that... Christian, Christian, Christian!" Then Liz explained to Sean why she and Alanis, I mean, Poppy, broke up: "No matter how much she told me she loved me, I never felt like I could shine when she was around." Sean: "I know exactly how you feel." Side note: I got my wish from last week when they gave Poppy and Liz more to do, but I wish I could've seen more scenes of them together leading up to the breakup. Like maybe Liz starting her breakup process by singing to Poppy: "You're uninvited.... ” Sorry, couldn't resist.
So, getting back to Sean, it did not surprise me when he told Christian he wanted to sell his share of McNamara/Troy to Christian and Michelle in order to discover who he is without Christian. We all know that breakup won't last long.
At first, when Gina (Jessalyn Gilsig) returned, it seemed like she was a new and improved Gina. After all, she greeted Christian with "Hello, Christian" rather than "Hello, a--hole." But, alas, she had turned into an even bigger psychotic mess than before. How unfortunate for cute little Wilber to have to experience both the restaurant confrontation (when Gina morphed into Alex Forrest) and the temporary kidnapping. Luckily, Gina discovered she just didn't want Wilber (better to find that out now than later). By the way, I knew that class act Gina would make an inappropriate comment about Michelle being black.
While I am mentioning inappropriateness and a lack of class, can we please talk about Kimber agreeing to do a porno with Matt? Yeah, right. Not the Scientologist version of Kimber. It cracked me up when Kimber confided in her Scientologist counselor Parker (Adria Dawn) that Matt was boring in bed. Like that was a shocker? But then Matt hired Kimber's mentor and favorite porno director Lena (Lorna Raver), which convinced Kimber to make the porno? Not buyin' it. Watching Matt attempt to be a porn star just made me laugh, and not in a good way. Enter Jim Walsh from Beverly Hills, 90210, aka James Eckhouse, as Dr. Schwartz, Kimber's Scientologist doctor, to break the news to Kimber that her performance was all over the Internet. I did enjoy Kimber's daydream that included visions of a sci-fi creature named Xenu, obviously a dig at science-fiction writer and Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, as well as seeing the former slutty version of herself referring to her newfound religion as "this crap." People on this show sure do see things.
At least our regular characters don’t talk to dummies. Oops, I take that back: Christian did talk to Gina tonight. But you know what I mean. Great intro to the ventriloquist patient Willy Ward, having Nurse Linda tell Sean: "Bring some milk and a bowl with you — he's cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs." Yes, it was a silly plot, but it sure did perfectly set up Sean's feelings of unworthiness around Christian. Christian turning into a ventriloquist dummy sitting on Sean's leg was pure genius: "Now get your hand out of my ass!" I thought Ronn Lucas as Willy was quite good, but even better was music supervisor P.J. Bloom's use of "I'm Your Puppet" by James & Bobby Purify during Willy's surgery. Another mid-'60s classic was featured effectively tonight: "Up, Up & Away” by the Fifth Dimension, heard during the opening boob job with the oh-so-appropriate lyrics, "... in my beautiful, my beautiful balloon.... "
See you next week for the season finale. I bet you're like me — I'm no dummy — I can't wait!
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Dec 6, 2006 5:51 AM
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i had a feeling that somebody was going to be in michelle's car....but i was so shocked to find out that it was escobar. and that james was actually working for escobar and not those french speaking japanese guys. by the way am i the only one who thinks that escobars face is disgusting to look at?? anyway the scenes between kimber and matt was sick sick sick. i thought i was going to throw up during that sceen. sick sick sick sick sick. sean leaving the business......thats not going to last long. it didnt even last long the last time it happened. i think sean needs to live like chritian for awhile. move into the bachelor apartment, drive a fancy sports car, and have lots of one night stands. but since this is sean thats not going to happen. i also love kimbers little fantasy about her new life isnt for her. wake up kimber your innerself is tyring to tell you something.im a little happy that james is gone. was getting sick of her. and i was freaked out by her being with lil wilbur. *nothing better happens to wilbur.* also glad that gina saw the light about not being in wilburs life. gina is a train wreck, and being around kids is not good for her or for the child. finally the stuff with willy and his dumby..... i was reminded by the old tv show from the 70's soap(im rewatching the show on demand). soap also had a guy who was a ventriliqist and the dummy did also do all the talking, and who told like it is.
anyway cant waite till the finale. and like i said before *nothing better not happens to wilbur*
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Dec 6, 2006 6:42 AM
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"I'm your puppet">>>pure genious. The music guy deserves an award...like NOW!
Whewww..I'm glad James is gone, but I'm tired of the organ stealing plot. Now it seems as Esco is keepin it alive. Nip/Tuck seems to run story lines in2 the ground lol.
Sean..he's not going for long, but I agree that he needs to find happiness. If only he would realize that its inside himself not another city or another practice. I felt bad for him bcuz Christian was leaving him outta his life. Christian needs to learn how to balance fam & friends..but actually Sean is pretty much family.
Matt & Kimber's porno shoulda been steamy but instead it was a bit sickening. I wonder if she'll end up havin that baby.
Gina>>PSYCHOOOOOOOOOO. Glad she gave up on Wilbur bcuz she is a hot mess. She's already screwed up and she doesnt need to screw up a kid in the process.
Cant wait for the finale. Loved the scene where Christian's yelling at Michelle about how she knows Esco. Angry Christian is pretty hot 
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Dec 6, 2006 8:55 AM
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Sadly, the Xenu reference wasn't simply a dig at Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard as a science fiction writer. Stories of the galactic overlord Xenu are part of the primary basis for Scientology. He was an alien that brought prisoners from another galaxy to Hawaii millions of years ago and blew them up with hydrogen bombs in the islands' volcanoes. Their angry spirits lead to our psychological problems. As she mentioned, members are not allowed to talk about all this until you are deep in the 'religion.' Got a bowl? Got milk?
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Dec 6, 2006 9:30 AM
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Cuckooooooo. Thanks n_finite for that info. How can ppl talk about that and not feel the slightest bit off the rocker?
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Dec 6, 2006 9:52 AM
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Thanks for letting me know where I'd seen the OB doc before. I about lost it when he told Kimber that rough sex is a form of child abuse. Do those scientologists really believe that? From what I've seen, that group is more about money than enlightenment. Didn't Matt and Kimber have to get money together so she could get to the next level? She had to go on their cruise at Christmas or something?
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Dec 6, 2006 10:03 AM
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During the ventriloquists surgery I was expecting a Tom Jones song - either "Puppet Man" or "Young New Mexican Puppeteer." I am always trying to figure out what songs they will pick, but the chosen one is always better than anything I think of.
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Dec 6, 2006 10:05 AM
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Frankly, I was hoping Gina would take Wilber. Maybe get him some acting lessons. What a drag on the story he's become! Of course, I know it's all a setup for some major disaster that will break up Christian and Michelle and leave us all with a bad taste in our mouths, but it couldn't come soon enough to please me. Wilber is even more annoying than Matt! Who would have thought it? I think if Sean were to leave the show and do a spin-off, I'd give him a shot. But this show is definitely spinning its wheels.
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Dec 6, 2006 11:22 AM
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I gotta say that I can't wait for this season to be over. I've been an avid watcher since episode 1 season 1 and I totally loved S1 and S2, but this show is really starting to get on my nerves.
Nothing is shocking any more and Julian McMahon is hot but if I never see his bare bottom again, it will be too soon.
Who didn't know James was gonna blow her own head off, I just kept screaming, "Stop talking and just do it already". This has become habit to me instead of must-see and the major storylines just aren't up to par. I think this might be my last year watching, I just get sick of the inconsistency and predictability of the dialogue.
There have been 3 good episodes this year. Two of them involved Liz and the other was the 2026 future episode. Were is the brilliance of Season 1 and 2? It seems that all it is any more is trying to throw out there the most shocking things possible and seeing if that pleases the masses. It's just not!
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Dec 6, 2006 11:27 AM
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How can u be annoyed at a 3 yr old. Acting lessons...HE'S THREE YEARS OLD. Surely u dont expect him to be giving Emmy performances. And what he gets 3 words per ep...come on. Wilbur is doin just fine.
I didnt like last season and didnt watch the last half of it..but I really liked this season..tired of the organ stealing but othr than thats its been quality.
The reality of it is that shows do change. The only show that I've been watching for years is Law and order: SVU...everything else has changed or gotten cancelled. But I dont think Nip/Tuck's changes have taken away from the show. O yea I still watch The Real World>>guilty pleasure
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Dec 6, 2006 11:41 AM
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I totally agree with buffybot! I am watching S3 out of habit. Every week I consider if I really want to watch the show. I'm glad it's almost over and I don't plan to watch S4. I loved S1 & S2 - what happened?!! It just doesn't "feel" like the same show.
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Dec 6, 2006 11:50 AM
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Thank you Ltr1. Wilbur is 3 years old, what acting lessons could he need. He's doing his job and probably getting paid quite well for it. I wasn't expecting them to age him so that he can try and become a Dr. at McNamara/Troy. I mean come on. I am so glad that it was Gina and not James that had kipnapped him from the playground. I've been saying since last week, "Let Christian have some happiness." Even if he and Michelle don't make it let him keep Wilbur.
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Dec 6, 2006 1:28 PM
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Michelle!!! Michelle!!! Why are you still alive?!?!!? AAAHHHH! I was sooo hoping James would kill you. Oh well, like my husband said at least we can still look at her nice breasts. (he said it a little more crassly but I didn't want to offend).
Oh well I guess I'll just have to look forward to the next opportunity of her dying. 'Cause you know she has to die, not only 'cause she's sooooo annoying but because the writers wont let Christian be happy for too long.
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Dec 6, 2006 2:33 PM
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I would like to see more Alanis Morissette back next year she is so spunky.
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Dec 6, 2006 4:29 PM
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