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« Ramblings From A Cracked (by the LPP) M&M
I've Come To A Decision!!!
When I become President and can make laws, I know a few I’ll make right away! Here they are:
If you’re going to drive a car, there are rules you need to follow. Here are just a few of them.
If your lane is ending and you are close to the back of my car in the other lane, and there is plenty of room for you to merge over, get behind me. Don’t speed up to squeeze in front of me and the car I’m behind because you want to be ONE car closer. Don’t make me have to slam on my brakes to let you get your big, honkin SUV in front of me. Just because you’re bigger than me doesn’t make you king/queen of the road!
If you’re going to pull out when there are cars coming, use the pedal on the right and get up to speed. Don’t go about 15 mph for the first few hundred feet. There are cars coming the speed limit and why should they have to slam on their brakes because you don’t know how to accelerate? I’m not asking you to speed. I can deal with slowing down so someone going the speed limit can be in front of me. Just get up to speed!
If you’re going to turn and there is this cool little lane in the middle of the street with arrows pointing both ways, get in that frackin lane to turn. Don’t stay in the left lane of the traffic and cause everyone to go around you. They aren’t turning, so why should they have to stop and wait for you to get to your destination? Also if you’re turning right, you do not need to stop before you turn into the huge driveway. It is possible to turn while still going a few mph.
If you’re trying to get out of a driveway or off a street, and someone is nice enough to let you get in front of them, you have to wave to thank them. They are not obligated to do so and are doing it to be nice.
If you drive a car bigger then the one turning right out of a parking lot, and you’re turning left, you MUST stay back to where you can both see the traffic. Why should the person turning right have to wait for both lanes to be clear to pull out because you’re rude and decide to block their view?
If you do any of the above, the people behind you have a right to hit you and there is nothing you can do about it. If you try to fight back with them, you go to jail and they get to go home. If you get hit more than 3 times, you have to revoke your license and find you a driver who knows how to drive. After a year, you can go take all the tests again to have a license reissued to you upon passing the driving test which will include at some point all of the above infractions.
I have a right to update this law as I see fit.
Oh yeah, I also have another new law, but it’s on a different topic.
If you know you’re going out of town in a few weeks and you want to get a puppy, you MUST wait until you get back from your trip. Don’t make someone puppy sit for you when your puppies (2 of them, one 8 weeks and one 5 weeks) aren’t house broken at all. Don’t make someone puppy sit for you when all your puppies can do is cry until they loose their voice. Don’t make someone do your job for you. This is the time YOU need to spend with YOUR puppies so you can train them the way you want them to be. I shouldn’t have to have puppy pee all over my house because the puppies can’t use the yard. I shouldn’t have to clean up the patio because your puppies don’t like the grass. I shouldn’t have to clean the kennel they are STAYING in the whole time unless they are outside because they make a mess in it. I shouldn’t have to make my poor, nice dog be nice to your puppies if they are going to be mean to her. If your puppies are going to be even the least bit mean to my dog and bark and growl at her for no reason, your puppies will be punished. My dog comes first to me. Hopefully this punishment will solve the problem after the first time but if not, I don’t mind letting them know again who the boss is. It’s not them. And if you’re going to get someone to puppy sit for you, PLEASE ask them before the day you’re leaving to go out of town for 9 days. 9 days of puppy whining and cleaning up all the time wears someone out who isn’t even going to keep the dogs.
Any questions?
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Jul 8, 2008 8:53 AM
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Yes, I have a question. Where's the rule that when you're President you're going to make everyone watch Veronica Mars? 
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Jul 8, 2008 9:03 AM
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Jul 8, 2008 9:04 AM
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Ok, Added law! Until everyone watches VM at least once, all their TV will play is Veronica Mars. If you turn off your TV, the episode will pick up where it left off. If you want to watch anything else, I suggest you finish those episodes then you can watch whatever you want. How is that Famin?
Why are you hiding Julie?
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Jul 8, 2008 9:07 AM
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Works for me, Mae!
Hey, just popped in to let y'all know I'm alive, but I just got slammed with three major projects which are all due by noon, which is less than three hours from now. Ulp. Later gators.
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Jul 8, 2008 9:11 AM
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I wasn't sure you would remember me!!
MANNIE FOR PRESIDENT
MANNIE FOR PRESIDENT
MANNIE FOR PRESIDENT
Dam* right those laws should be enforced!!! I can't tell you how many times I feel like I am ruining my car just because I try to be a courteous driver. I ALWAYS try to go fast enough when pulling out in front of someone so they don't have to slow down. And how about if you are taking a left and there is nobody coming in the other lane ~ turn a bit earlier so I can just go by!!!!!!! But no ~ they go slow until they get right there and then turn... People drive me crazy. But most people don't have a freaking clue and NEVER think of anyone else. And people should be required to wave thank you!!!
And how could someone get a puppy and actually expect someone else to train it??? That is the hardest part. They must have known you would do a better job at it....
Oh is it any wonder why I love you Mannie?? I agree 100% with everything you said!!!!
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Jul 8, 2008 9:24 AM
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Thanks Julie! Where have you been?
She originally had only 1 puppy with me (I didn't know she had another). She dropped it off Friday, then Saturday night asked me if I could watch her other puppy. I didn't know what to say so I said yes thinking maybe they'll keep eachother company and shut up a little bit. The other puppy was dropped off Sunday morning and had apparently been to 5 houses already, but no one wanted to keep it. When the people dropped it off, they told me it whined ALL THE TIME. I said there was no way it could whine more than the other puppy and that's somewhat true. They pretty much sleep thru the night after they know I'm not coming back to where they are after they cry for about an hour.
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Jul 8, 2008 9:31 AM
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I was on vacation and now I have a ton of crap to get caught up on! Be back around lunch!!!
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Jul 8, 2008 9:40 AM
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What kind of puppies were they???
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Jul 8, 2008 9:40 AM
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Next bill for consideration to go into law Madam President
Anyone caught wearing their pants below their hips (near their knees), exposing their cracks and dirty underwears, will discover the new meaning to the term "skid marks"!! Grr!!! 
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Jul 8, 2008 10:09 AM
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Those are some good laws Mannie. I think I might add one.
People who agree to puppysit for one much less two unhousebroken puppies ought to have their head examined by law.
There may be something seriously wrong!
Just kidding. Such a person would be a priceless friend to have!
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Jul 8, 2008 10:15 AM
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And here I thought I had no one to vote for this fall!  MANNIE FOR PREZ!
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Jul 8, 2008 10:24 AM
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Oh fair and magnanimous Madam President..........For real.....run for president!!! I WILL HELP YOU!! We all will I kid you not. The Puppy Law will go right into effect!
xoxo, Zia
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Jul 8, 2008 10:34 AM
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The youngest one is a pit bull and the older one looks like a boxer.
That'd be a good law too Philly! This just in!!! NO ONE wants to see your underwear!!!! *Let me modify that, unless you're really hot, no one wants to see your underwear.*
Lynda - when she asked me to puppy sit, I figured the puppy was at least a few months old and had been house broken. She said it whines to let you know it needs to go out (it whines all the time, so how do you know which whine to listen too???). When she brought it over, I asked how old it was. I think I do need my head examined.
Thanks Vickie and Zia. It just takes some common sense!!!
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Jul 8, 2008 10:43 AM
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My Dear Mannie you seem a bit stressed and out of sorts today I would include a nice picture of M&M's if I knew how. So just picture a big bowl of M&M's like the one sitting at my co-workers desk next to the bowl of Combos next to the bowl of Milky Ways, Next to the bowl of Snickers.
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Jul 8, 2008 11:00 AM
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